It’s now the time of the year that most people make New Year’s Resolutions. I am no different, in this tradition. I plan to lose weight this year. Yep, gonna drop those extra pounds to get in shape. However, I also typically keep the tradition of not meeting my resolution of losing weight. So this year I’ve decided to change things up.
Studies show that it’s not mentally healthy to make resolutions and not keep them. This leads to self-delusion and cognitive dilution and such things. And I don’t like being diluted. So this year, instead of making a resolution that I’m not gonna keep anyway, I’m gonna set more realistic goals. This year, I plan to gain 30 pounds. Just the thought of this goal instills me with confidence and excitement. I won’t be drudging through the first few weeks of the year, struggling to keep my new resolution. I anticipate maintaining a high level of intensity and duration for this goal. This year, I’m going to keep my New Year’s Resolution!
If any of you reading this have any New Year’s Resolutions that will make you happier, feel free to share. We should all be happier and laugh more.
Oh, yeah, there’s one more resolution — 2007 will be the best year of Buffet o’ Blog ever. There will be more exclusive, original content than you can shake a stick at, and the quality of the humor and randomness will be raised to an even higher standard. You just wait and see… It’s gonna be great!
Thomas Wayne
I get the first comment of 2007! 🙂
I like your idea of a realistic resolution… but to improve, I think I’ll aim for only 20 pounds instead of 30.
On the site, you oughta to have more free-for-all stories… those are fun.
Thomas Wayne
Where’s all the innovative resolutions? Did the rest of y’all make a resolution to be more boring? 😮
I have a couple more :
* Fight global hunger… starting with this Hostess Ding Dong.
* Attempt to do some of that “work” crap my boss keeps yammering about. (My boss thinks it’s important that I try to “pull my weight”, but if he thinks I’m working that hard, he’s crazy!)
Potato de Sofa
I resolve to help others beat anorexia as I have.
Thomas Wayne
I prefer making resolutions for other people… 🙂
* Beppo, lose 30 pounds.
* Important Doctor, quit being so stupid. 🙂
* A.G.O.C., give others your “gift”, by the laying on of hands.
* Mango-Man, back off the flowers, be a man.
* my team leader, give me better performance reviews.
And so on…
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