I recently heard of a woman with the last name of Butts.  (Bless her heart!)  So I’d imagine in various circumstances she’s referred to as Mrs. Butts.  Why does someone have the last name of Butts?  Perhaps it used to not mean what it does today.  According to my research (I actually did some, if a search with Google counts), it used to refer to a mark on a target in archery.  And in centuries past, people often took on the name of their trade/occupation.  But I’m thinking I’d change my name if that was my last name now — if not for my sake, for the sake of any children I might have.  Can you imagine how much ridicule they would face going through public schools?  They’d most certainly be the butt of many jokes…

I know, it’s not fair to have to change your name because the meaning of the word changed.  But what can you do?  Suppose your name was “wuss”.  Would you change it or endure the ridicule for the rest of your life?  I would consider it an opportunity to officially change my name to something really cool.

On a side note, in my research I learned that a “butt” is also “a large bulk-measure cask, with established volumes and quantities for various commodities in historic marketplaces”.  I think it’s obvious why that measurement isn’t used anymore.  Imagine going to a grocery story and asking for a butt full of flour.  AWW-RIGHT!  🙂

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Site search tags: humor, humour, butt, butts, name, ridicule, jokes, archery, measurement

I don’t know how certain events get “honored” during a certain month, but I’d like to add some of my own.  Looking at the list of special days in September, just about anything would fit in.  Let’s look at a few.  (And I think some of these will be of interest to you.  There’s something for everyone.)

September is National Chicken Month.  I don’t know if that means I should eat more or less chicken.  I’m going to suppose it means more, because I like eating chicken.

September is also National School Success Month.  Does that mean students should try harder for success in school during September?  Sounds like it.  It seems like the months of finals (December and May) would be better for that.  But what do I care?  I never knew about this when I was in school, and now I’m not in school.

The third week of September is National Farm Animals Awareness Week.  I’m not sure what should be done about this, either.  Should we learn about them?  Should we take them a doggie biscuit?  Or should we give thanks for farm animals before eating a big country breakfast of eggs, bacon, sausage, ham, and biscuits & gravy, washed down with milk?  I’m thinking the latter sounds most delectable to me.  (Perhaps we should schedule a breakfast at Stoby’s that week.)

There’s even a National Flowers Week — also the third week — which would be applicable to the man who likes flowers.  ‘Nuff said about that.

There’s also a lot of special days, although some of them make no sense whatsoever.  September 2nd is National Beheading Day.  I will definitely NOT be participating in that one!  How about we remove that one from the calendar…

Here’s one that most everyone would like — September 5th is National Cheese Pizza Day.  It’s too bad I just found out about it.  But I say it’s not too late to celebrate this one.  Go eat a cheese pizza.  It would be all patriotic and stuff.  Also on the 5th is Be Late for Something Day.  Since that was a workday, I probably took part in that.  But had I known it was a special day, I would’ve been extra late for work.  🙂

Today, September 7th, is Neither Rain Nor Snow Day.  What?  It rained here, so the weather did not cooperate at all.

September 11th is Make Your Bed Day.  So for all of you who normally don’t make your bed, this is the one day of the year that you’re supposed to.  I don’t know why, but I reckon making the sacrifice to do it once per year isn’t too unreasonable.

This is kinda silly, isn’t it?  But wait, there is a good one coming up.  September 12th is National Chocolate Milk Shake Day.  I’m all about that!  To help us celebrate this special event, restaurants ought to give a discount on milkshakes that day, to help motivate everyone to go get one.  And I read that most people who celebrate this day will drink not just one, but two or more chocolate milkshakes that day, whether they’re on a diet or not.  Mmm…  Also on the 12th is National Video Games Day.  So it sounds like I should stay home from work that day to play video games and drink milkshakes.  Does anyone else interpret it that way?

I’m not even covering half of these, but the list goes on.  Sept. 15th is Make A Hat Day.  I’ll pass on that one.  Sept. 16th is Collect Rocks Day.  Ditto.  Sept. 18th is Mushroom Picking Day.  Seriously, why is this even on the calendar?  Who decided there should be a day to celebrate these things?

But there is one of these special holidays that is growing in popularity and fame — International Talk Like a Pirate Day, which is September 19th.  I recommend you participate in this one.  It’s a good time.  It also makes work more fun.

I could go on, but you can read the list (linked above) if you’re interested in reading more about these obscure holidays.

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