my trip to the 2007 Faulkner County Fair

I went to the Faulkner County Fair the other night, to see what-all was going on.  I’ve been to numerous small-town fairs and carnivals, so I expected this one to be bigger and better since it’s in a city of over 50,000 people.  But I was disappointed.  It wasn’t that much different, and everything has become so expensive.  I knew the food would be high, but the rides were even higher!  My wife and I were going to ride the Ferris Wheel, but then we discovered it costs $8 for the two of us, and it’s not that exciting.  Is that the typical going fare for carnival rides now?  It would get expensive real quick to participate in even a quarter of the rides and games there.

Now on to a few less-serious observations.  Seeing the kiddie rides brought back memories of years past.  There was a carousel horse ride, and I remembered riding on it as a kid.  Of course I don’t care about riding it now, but I imagined how it might struggle under my current weight.  Picture it going slow, the music dragging, smoke coming out from underneath…  🙂

There was a rock climbing / wall scaling attraction, and it was kinda funny to see some people try the expert side but then not even get off the first set of handles.  I knew better than to even try that…

We got a candy apple (covered in caramel) there, and it was really good.  Also saw where a concession stand was selling nachos, and I remembered seeing in Walmart a product that advertised itself as the nacho cheese featured in concession stands.  I’m not sure that’s a good way to market your product.  Although when I was a kid, I thought it was good.  But now that I’ve had much better nachos and cheese dip, that “fake” cheese just doesn’t seem so good anymore.  But to each their own…

We did get to see a lot of farm animals, like cows, goats, pigs, and chickens.  There’s nothing like that fresh, natural, barnyard scent, featuring lots of methane and manure.  I guess you get used to it if you work with them.

I was thinking the carnival could’ve been so much more.  I’m sure kids would enjoy it, but there wasn’t a lot of grown-ups.  I would’ve rode the bumper cars, but my long legs don’t fit in there too well anymore.  (I still remember the first time I realized I had become too tall to ride them.  It was a sad day, indeed.)

They should include some virtual reality rides there.  They could be built into a trailer that unpacks, so transport would be easier than the other stuff they had.  And I think a lot of people would be interested in it.  They could also have some state-of-the-art video games.  Maybe next year…

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It’s International Talk Like A Pirate Day

Ahoy, me hearty!  Today be International Talk Like A Pirate Day, which is a great, grand holiday indeed!  Today you must talk like a pirate whene’er you get the chance.  ARRR!  To ye lily-livered landlubbers, don’t ye be afraid of this.  It’ll make e’reyones day a bit more surreal.  Aye!

Now I must get back to my swashbucklin’ out on the seven seas…  ARRR!  🙂

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researching the effect of slacking at work

If you haven’t heard, I lost my job last week, as part of a corporate layoff due to economic reasons.  So while I’m pondering what kind of career I want, I came up with what would be perfect for me.  It would be a major career change, but I’m open to new ideas.

The government pays all kinds of groups to do research.  I could conduct a study on the impact of slacking at work.  There are a lot of studies already done on the effects of taking breaks at work (and they all say it’s a good thing), so slacking would somewhat fit that, in that it’s like a break, but it’s different.  And here’s where it’s best for me — since my job would be researching and the point of the research is how slacking affects it, I would be getting paid to not work.  How great is that?

So now I just have to figure out how to get this approved and sponsored.  I think it would be a very beneficial study, and I’m willing to make the necessary sacrifices to see it come to fruition.  This would help corporations realize the importance of a relaxed atmosphere / environment in the workplace.  And this would be a job that I’d enjoy working on.

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quotes from cartoons, pt. 7

Somehow it’s been several months since I last wrote on the series.  So now I will continue it, since it’s a good thing.  For some of you, this brings back lots of good memories.  If for whatever reason it doesn’t, then you should watch more cartoons.  It’s really that simple.  Cartoons are not just for kids.  (Well, some are, but those are best ignored by all.)  Anyway, let’s get started…

I’m afraid my sidekicks are copping an attitude. ~ Space Ghost

Whoa, Space Ghost, man!  Crack a window, will ya! ~ Bobcat Goldwaith, on Space Ghost Coast to Coast

Another genius foiled by an incapable assistant. ~ Calvin

We demand that you bring this planet up to code! ~ Calvin and Hobbes

I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty. ~ Bart Simpson, on the chalkboard

Maybe, just once, someone will call me ‘sir’ without adding, ‘you’re making a scene.’ ~ Homer Simpson

I’m sorry for making gravy in the bathtub. ~ Homer Simpson

Marge: Homer, I think we have someone here who can help you.
Homer: Is it Batman?
Marge: No, he’s a scientist.
Homer: Batman’s a scientist.
Marge: It’s NOT Batman!!

Sometimes even the wisest of man or machine can make an error. ~ Optimus Prime, Transformers

Destiny’s powerful hand has made the bed of my future and it’s up to me to lie in it.  I am destined to be a superhero, to right wrongs and pound two-fisted justice into the hearts of evil-doers everywhere.  You don’t fight destiny, no sir!  And you don’t eat crackers in the bed of your future or you get all… itchy. ~ The Tick

Leela: Didn’t you have ads in the 21st century?
Fry: Well sure, but not in our dreams.  Only on TV and radio, and in magazines, and movies, and at ball games… and on buses and milk cartons and T-shirts, and bananas and written on the sky.  But not in dreams, no siree.
~ from Futurama

Fry: This can’t be happening!
Bender: It can and for all you know it is.
~ from Futurama

Now that you’re going off to war, I don’t want you to worry about your job. That’s why you’re fired. ~ from Futurama

“Say, Pooh, why aren’t YOU busy?” I said.
“Because it’s a nice day,” said Pooh.
“Yes, but—”
“Why ruin it?” he said.

[Stimpy puts the Happy Helmut on Ren]
Ren: [panicky] ‘ey!  What iz this?  Get it off me!
Stimpy: It’s the Happy Helmut, Ren.  Now you’ll always be happy!  And this is the remote control, and I use this button to control how happy you are.
Ren: YOU, SICK LITTLE MONKEY!
~ Ren & Stimpy

Ren: All right, Stimpy.  He’s got us.  Give him back the five bucks.
Stimpy: [crying] I can’t! I’ve been bad, Ren.  You’ll smack me.
Ren: When have I ever?  Now go ahead.  Tell me what’s wrong.
Stimpy: All this talk about eating made me hungry.  I ate the five bucks.
Ren: [Slaps Stimpy] You stupid idiot!  You filthy worm!  You bloated sack!
~ Ren & Stimpy

Ooooh, FREAK OUT! ~ Dexter Douglas, Freakazoid

Something smells like poo gas! ~ Cosgrove, Freakazoid

Hans: Now, come.  We mustn’t linger.  It is not safe here at night.
Freakazoid: It’s day.
Hans: Well, then, I suppose we can linger for a moment.
~ Freakazoid

A Lawn Gnome: We are wise and cunning.
Another Lawn Gnome: We stole man’s fire and then tried to hide it in our pockets.
A Lawn Gnome: That was painful and dumb.  So we became even more cunning.
~ Freakazoid

If either of you ever again ridicule an over weight person, I will personally sit on you! ~ FatMan, Freakazoid

Bad guy: Only America could produce an imbecile of your caliber.
Freakazoid: That’s because we make lots of things better than other people!
~ Freakazoid

I believe in superheroes.  I believe they are kind, righteous people who keep their word.  I admire and I respect them.  All except the Hulk fella, him I no like.  He’s got a bad smell.  Anyway, a few weeks ago, my daughter, she started dating a boy… not a Shriner.  When he come to da house for the first time, I take him to da garage, to show him my little putt-a-putt.  That’s what I call my little Shriner car, my little putt-a-putt.  When we get to da garage, this boy, his name is “Snortz” or something, he takes one look at my little car, and he starts laughing and saying: “What a stupid little car!  Hey mister, why you have such a stupid little dumb little stupid-car?  This boy!  He make fun of my little putt-a-putt in front of-a my daughter!  I felt the fool! ~ Mr. Fizzizzi, Freakazoid

Grim: How come every time I take you kids to the mall it burns to the ground?
Billy: I blame it on the economy.
~ The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy

I am the epitome of destruction… ~ gorilla to Samurai Jack

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