Now we will continue our look at the special days of May. This part will focus on holidays or observances on individual days.
- 1 May Day — This is supposed to be a celebration of spring and the coming of summer. In Hawaii, it’s known as “Lei Day”. In many countries, it’s a one to three day holiday. If it means getting off work, we should celebrate it here in the U.S.
- 1 Space Day — I suppose you can just stare off into space this day. It would be great if we could all get a free trip to space, so we can really appreciate it. But that’s probably not in the space exploration budget…
- 3 Lumpy Rug Day — Uhh… what exactly are you supposed to celebrate here? I’d figure you don’t want your rug to be lumpy… but to each his own.
- 4 Bird Day — This holiday has gone to the birds…
- 4 National Candied Orange Peel Day — What? I didn’t know people even did this? Why?
- 4 National Weather Observers’ Day — I sometimes observe the weather, so I reckon this is a day for me! Maybe there will be a thunderstorm with lots of lightning on this day!
- 5 Cinco de Mayo — I hear a lot of people talk about this holiday every year, but it’s supposed to be a day to be proud of your Hispanic descent. So it doesn’t apply to me (or most of the people I hear talking about it).
- 5 National Hoagie Day — This is a holiday I can support. This day you should eat a large hoagie / sub / hero sandwich, piling on the toppings of your choice. Remember, since it’s a holiday, diets don’t apply, so add all the toppings you want (including bacon).
- 6 Beverage Day — My favorite beverage is sweet tea, specifically BOH tea from Malaysia (which is difficult to acquire in these parts). But I drink this regularly, so for it to be a special day, restaurants ought to make beverages be free. It sounds reasonable to me. 🙂
- 6 No Diet Day — This is what I’m talking about! This should be a holiday every month! Like it says, no diets apply, so eat whatever you want this day.
- 7 National Tourism Day — If we’re supposed to support tourism on this day, that means we need to be off work! You can’t be a tourist in your home area, so you need time off work to travel around.
- 8 No Socks Day — The person who created this day professes that not wearing socks will reduce your laundry load, therefore it’s good for the environment. If that’s true, we might as well take it a step further. Just stay home this day, wearing only your underwear, and playing video games. 🙂
- 9 Lost Sock Memorial Day — A memorial for lost socks? There’s no need to get mushy or sentimental over that! Just buy some new socks. Although, if you happen to have a problem of mad goats eating socks out of your dryer, then that could get expensive, but you might want to do something about that…
- 10 Clean up Your Room Day — Let’s not and pretend we did…
- 11 Mother’s Day — I’m very thankful that my mom had me. You should be, too. Because if I hadn’t been born, the world would really be missing out… 🙂
11 Eat What You Want Day — Obviously diets don’t apply on this day, either, because what I want doesn’t fit into normal diets. Hmm, what should I eat this day? Pizza is always a good choice, and cheeseburgers, and nachos, and Mexican all-you-can-eat places would be a great place to go, and seafood buffets, and fudge brownies and ice cream with chocolate syrup drizzled over it, and I could go on. This really needs to be more than one day!!!
- 11 Twilight Zone Day — Dun dun DUN!
- 12 Fatigue Syndrome Day — One of the suggested activities today is to sleep in.
- 12 Limerick Day — If you want to flex your poetic non-muscles, this is the day. Perhaps someone would like to write one in the comments section. (Any time is fine.)
- 13 Leprechaun Day — Has anyone ever seen one of these Irish midgets? (Or is it a faerie?) If you catch one, ask him where his treasure is hidden, because he’s supposed to tell you. I could use some extra treasure, so let me know if you know where one is.
- 14 Dance Like a Chicken Day — Do chickens dance? I dunno. According to one website, this is a “tradition at every wedding reception”. I’m glad we didn’t know about it at my wedding! There were way too many people with cameras there for me to act the fool. But I don’t believe that anyway — I think they’re just making that up, trying to make people act stupid for others’ enjoyment.
15 National Chocolate Chip Day — This is a most excellent use of a holiday (much better than the last one!). This day, you should eat as many chocolate chip cookies as you want. And have plenty of milk handy, too. I don’t know why, but milk goes really well with chocolate chip cookies.
This list is getting considerably long, so I’m going to continue it in the next post. (Click here to search for the other ones.)
Fab
For Limerick Day and our fellow commenter Mango-Man:
There once was a man who loved flowers
He sat and stared at them for hours
He tried to deny it
But his friends wouldn’t buy it
Over Mango-Man they had such a power
and…………
I’m glad I’m not Mango-Man’s guitar
In the case in the back seat of his car
‘Cause he wouldn’t even tune ya
Too preoccupied with ketunias
And every other variety of flar (flower)
Mango-man
I’m glad I’m not FAB
with a most obnoxious gift up gab
he stay’s up late,
making up things that are fake
if only a brain cell he had.
and…
i’m glad i’m not fabs blog
ignored by him and by all.
he never even posts
and he’s the butt of most jokes
me think’s he’s had too much grog.
and…
Mango man likes no flower
I guess fabs brain has gone sour
also TW, i’d like to say
that today is L.A.
we should go stay a few hours.
Thomas Wayne
Mango-man and Fab each took a jab
with their own unique brand of blab.
But we should determine the winner
over a Mexican food dinner
with the loser picking up the tab.
Fab
Fab won’t be eating with you
He has too much “stuff’ to do
That makes him the winner
He won’t buy your dinner
And his limericks were much better too
Oh, and one more for the flower boy….
You can always find a rose
At the end of Mango-Man’s nose
It’s his favorite flower
He sniffs them for hours
Now I bring this poem to a close
Mango-man
Me thinks Fab is in a rut
his ramblings don’t amount to much
he’s correct, as often as NEVER
He (mistakenly) thinks he’s clever
while sniffing and scratching his butt.
another…
as fab’s poetry before mine bow’s
I hereby today make this vow
I shall shortly partake of LA’s buffet
that time will quicly speed by I pray…
but alas, I’m hungry NOW
Thomas Wayne
Fab avoided my challenge to eat
because he was afraid of defeat.
He talks a lot of smack
but his rhymes are all wack
so now he must retreat.
Fab
Of food, I am not afraid
Nor of the “challenges” made
Some still have to work
So don’t go berserk
Thinking my abilities fade
Thomas Wayne
You make excuses, but so?
It sounds like you’re scared to go.
Let’s hit a pizza buffet,
I’ll take you down any day,
then you’ll know, f’sho!
Buffet o' Blog Administrator
Just got an e-mail via our “Contact Us” form, from someone who wanted to explain the reference to “Lumpy Rug Day”. It has to do with shoving facts under the rug. It’s from “The Puns Corps Calendar”. You can read more here: link.