Chuck Norris vs a bear

What would happen if a bear attacked Chuck Norris?  There is a video from Walker Texas Ranger that resolves the question.

As you can see, the bear made a surprise attack on Chuck Norris from behind.  Obviously the bear didn’t realize who he was messing with.  Fighting a bear while laying on the ground would be a losing proposition for most people.  You might have dreams of how you would fend it off, but a bear is so many times stronger than a normal human.  But of course, in this video, this isn’t an ordinary human — it’s Chuck Norris.  So he wrestles the bear back, stands to his feet, and then stares the bear down.  I figure his “death stare” was probably conveying the information “I’m Chuck Norris, and if you don’t depart immediately, you will surely die.”  Wisely, the bear left.

I like how they used a judicious amount of slow-motion footage, to add drama to it, even though there’s no way Chuck Norris gets killed by a bear.  And it’s humorous how the woman picked up a stick like she was gonna help, but she just stood there watching.

Oh, and BTW, Chuck Norris doesn’t bleed.  I know it looks like there was some blood on his shirt and hand, but it was either the bear’s blood, or he had some ketchup packets in his pocket.

4 thoughts on “Chuck Norris vs a bear

  1. Say What?!

    definitely ketchup in the pocket. Chuck was shocked to notice his stash of ketchup was gone and gave the Bear his death stare.

    No bear should come between a man and his ketchup.

    Take the woman.
    but leave the ketchup.

  2. mangoman

    isn’t is possible that the woman was just gathering firewood so she could cook something to eat ketchup on? alternately she may have been preparing to cook bear, since it’s obvious that grizzly had no chance against chuck. … it’s a shame about the ketchup though.

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