funny quotes that should make you laugh

People have varied tastes in the humor they appreciate, so it’s near impossible to guarantee what will make everyone laugh.  For example, there are actually some people who don’t find The 3 Stooges funny.  Go figure!  Anyway, here’s some funny, random quotes that, under normal circumstances, should make you laugh.  Even if you don’t laugh outloud or chuckle softly, perhaps you’ll at least be amused somewhat.  If none of those apply to you after finishing this post, perhaps you should consult a humorologist.  Don’t take your laughing too lightly.  It’s important that you laugh on a regular basis.  Now, on to the quotes!

People like lists. VH1 could count down the top 50 worst songs of all time, and people would watch to the bitter end. ~ Tom Merritt

It is better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all. ~ Lester “Roadhog” Moran

Saying something over and over again doesn’t make it true — unless, of course, you’re saying, “I’m obnoxious and repetitive.” ~ kremben

I treat people as if they were telephones.  If I meet somebody who I don’t think likes me, I say to myself, “Bob, this one’s temporarily out of order.”  You know.  Don’t break the connection.  Just hang up and try again. ~ What About Bob?

Boy, is my wife going to be surprised!  She always wanted to repaint the kitchen in a nice olive color, so while she’s away on business, I’m going to get busy with these fresh new rollers and gallons of black paint. ~ Brad Simanek

Give a man a piece of working code and you solve his problem.  Teach a man to write code and you give him a lifetime of new problems.

God never gives us more than we can handle.  Luckily, though, Bubba’s Big Boy Buffet does.

We need to know who wrote the Declaration of Independence and when to use an apostrophe in its, but more than that we need to know how to love to learn and how to totally entertain people at cocktail parties.  Do you think folks who use apostrophes right are the hit of cocktail parties?  Nope.  It’s those of us who can hypnotize chickens, every time.

I still think one of mankind’s greatest inventions is that little brown strip that appears in the bottom of my underwear to tell me when it’s time to wash them. ~ Michael F.

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