caption contest, toilet abused

It’s time for a new caption contest!  This week, we’re going to feature a gross picture.   Be forewarned that some people might find this disturbing or even inappropriate.  It’s a picture of a toilet, with an abundance of poop and toilet paper in it.   And when I say abundance, I mean overflowing.  If you can’t stomach the grossness, then don’t scroll down to see the picture.

Before we get to that, I want to feature a short editorial rant on today’s subject matter (which also conveniently places the picture further down, to help certain people).  I realize that some people get offended at the mere mention of poop / feces, so the sight of it may be too much to handle.  But let’s look at it this way: you most likely see poop every single day.   So don’t act like your farts don’t stink, pretending that you’re too socially advanced and high-minded for such things.   Everyone poops.  It’s part of nature.

Now let’s address the issue of why there would be a picture of a toilet with poop in it, since everyone sees it every day anyway.  I don’t necessarily enjoy looking at poop, and you probably don’t either.  Well, this is what you call a caricature — a picture that exaggerates or distorts something, either for emphasis or entertainment.  So basically, this photo is humorous (to some) because it goes way beyond what is normal.   I realize that some people still might get offended despite my reasoning, so if that’s you, either go to another page, or press “Page Down” twice quickly, to avoid it.   You have been forewarned.

Finally, let’s get to the picture.   I realize there’s no people in it, so your caption (or craption, which might be more appropriate this time) can be for whoever finds this or whoever has to clean it up or just as general commentary / narrative.  Or if you can make a joke out of it, go ahead.  Just don’t use cuss words — this is still a family-friendly site, despite the grossness of this picture.

toilet-abused

You can click on the pic for a larger version, if you dare.

(To see the other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)

crappy glitch in Madden football

The Madden series of football video games has been extremely popular, but like almost all video games, there are bugs / glitches just waiting to be found.   (It’s extremely difficult to be a video game programmer.)  The bug featured in this video is more of a graphical glitch, in that the “boundary” between the football and the player just didn’t line up correctly.  But if you consider the glitch in-game, it’s one of the most painful glitches ever.

To warn you, this video is gross (in concept, because it’s not reality, y’know).  What happens is that Rex Grossman craps a football.   If you can’t handle such humor, then obviously you shouldn’t watch the video.  You have been forewarned.

We’ve also written about another one, which is much more awesome — the infamous ambulance in Madden ’92, which runs over players.  🙂

Help, my bathroom smells like crap!

If your bathroom stinks, a common practice is to light a candle.  But sometimes a single candle just doesn’t cut through the effervescence of flatulescence.  You could try lighting an array of candles, although you might not want to go through that trouble, or you might not have multiple candles available.  So here’s what you can do — just burn the whole candle at once.  That way, all the freshness gets released at once.

(Tip: It works better if the candle is not in a glass container.  Photo is for illustration purposes only.)

offended at poop

Look at this…

poop in yard

I don’t have to tell you what this is.  This is poop.  You can call it crap, turds, or whatever colorful euphemism for feces you want.  Either way, it’s gross.  (As the saying goes, poop by any other name smells the same.)  But there’s no need for you to get offended… it’s not real poop.  It’s a picture of real poop, so what we have here is a virtual representation.  It doesn’t stink, and it won’t make a mess.  Go ahead and touch it.  See, nothing happens.  So don’t get all offended.

But I am offended.  The problem with this poop is that it’s in my yard.  But I didn’t put it there, neither did anyone associated with my household.  I have no pets at this time.  And I did not sign up for the fertilize-your-yard chain letter.  So this pile of poop was placed in my yard illegally.  Yeah, someone was trespassing.

I figure it was someone’s dog, but that’s still WRONG!  People shouldn’t let their dog poop in my yard!  If I knew who it was, I could toss it on their driveway, to make sure they took notice of it.

Let’s hope this doesn’t happen again, before bad things happen…