eating while your wife shops

As I mentioned in the last post, I was recently in Branson with the in-laws on vacation for a weekend, and I knew the women would be doing some shopping.  There’s a few outlet malls there, plus the newer promenade mall.  I can take only so much shopping, unless it’s for electronics or games.

I was talking about this with one of my friends, and he had an interesting suggestion for something I could do while the women are shopping:

Find an all-you-can-eat buffet and try to make a day of it. If your wife mentions that you probably don’t need to eat that much, you can always reference the fact that she probably doesn’t really need to shop that much either. Tell her that the sooner she gets back from shopping to pick you up, that is the sooner you will stop eating.

I like this idea.  It would tie-in with the idea of the last post where a store offers an atmosphere for men along with lots of nachos and other good eats.  But even without such a place, there are plenty of all-you-can-eat restaurants in Branson.  If my wife thinks I should eat less to help me lose weight, she can shop less, which will save money.  So it’s a win-win situation!

I mentioned this idea to my wife, but she failed to see the logic of it…

a store for men is needed

Recently I was on vacation in Branson, and one day the women were shopping at the different outlet malls.  Every time I find myself in this situation, I wonder why someone doesn’t open a store for men.  There is occasionally a tools store, but I still don’t want to spend all day there.  Even if I were to shop for clothes, it wouldn’t take very long.  (That’s just one of the areas where men and women are generally different.)

What I’m thinking of is a place where you can rent recliners for naps or to watch sports or play video games and/or eat nachos.  I think there’s a market for it.  I could justify spending a few dollars to do that while women look at clothes for hours.  Maybe we should open one — I’m certain we could make it awesome.

We could also sell new versions of the equipment in there — TVs, game consoles, games, recliners, etc., and have it delivered.  And we could sell off the used equipment at discount when it’s time to replace it.  If people can play video games, you’d surely sell some of them.  If necessary, you could occasionally show ads targeted at men, like for sports cars, tools, video games, action movies, flamethrowers, etc.  Ideally you wouldn’t have to show ads, but still, I could tolerate a few if it meant spending a few hours watching sports or playing video games instead of sitting around.

too much meat

Today I went to my favorite Mexican restaurant (as I do every week).  I’m friends with the owner and he came by our table to talk while we waited on our food.  He’s planning to make some menu changes, so we had some suggestions.  (If any of these suggestions get implemented, you’ll get a review here, because they would be awesome.)

He told us about one customer who had an odd complaint about the menu.  Some guy told him, “Your menu has too much meat.”  That is absolutely, totally, and in all other ways, inconceivable!

I’m not sure you can have too many meat options.  Besides, the owner said there is a vegetarian section in the menu that no one orders from, plus they have a variety of bean and cheese dishes.

I just don’t understand why a man would say such a thing…

caption contest, truck on a house

Now that I’m back from vacation, let’s get the weekly caption contest back on schedule.  While in Colorado, I saw a few bad drivers.  But none of the bad driving I saw can compete with this picture.  Somehow a truck is on the roof of a house, and there’s a fair bit of destruction around it.  There’s also a guy in the picture, holding a beer and laughing.

The actual context behind this picture is unknown, so make up whatever story you want to fit your explanation.  There’s a few obvious captions, but you can also use your creativity to come up with something really random.

(To see our other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)