black vs brown shoes & belt

Today I’m going to answer a question from one of our viewers, submitted via our new contact form.

My wife said it is “bad” to wear black shoes or a black belt with non-black pants, that I need to get some brown shoes and belts.  (And I’m pretty sure she didn’t mean the good kind of bad.)  But what’s the problem?  Will bad things happen?  What’s the big deal?

Mismatched and confused
Conway, AR

Dear Mismatched in Conway,

Many wives have said such things, leaving their husbands in a state of confusion.  But I’ve not encountered any of these “bad things” that are supposed to happen.  Just the other day, I wore navy pants with black shoes and a black belt, and nothing bad happened.  And nobody even said anything about it.  I suppose it’s possible that someone didn’t like it, but I could wear my best clothes and some people still won’t like them, so I don’t see why it matters.

So wear what makes you happy and comfortable (and is convenient).  Don’t get all caught up in these fashion trends — they change every few months anyway.  Why, maybe next year it will be fashionable / cool to wear navy pants and black shoes.  Besides, everyone will never agree on such things anyway.  For example, some people think it’s cool to wear your hair all messy, like you didn’t even fix it, yet most people thinks this looks a mess.  Whatever…  To each their own.

Anti Monkey Butt Powder

Someone told me about a uniquely-named product : Anti Monkey Butt Powder.  It’s for people who get chafed from activities like motorcycling, bicycling, horseback riding, etc.  It absorbs sweat and reduces friction and irritation.  The name comes from the monkeys with exposed buttocks.  Apparently some people use this term to describe chafing and soreness, but I’ve never heard it around here.

This is a real product, not something we imagined.  It is manufactured by Anti Monkey Butt Corporation.  (How is that for a unique name? Imagine putting that on your business card…)  Amazon.com even sells this product, for $5.95.  Someone in the reviews there said it “can be dangerous if inhaled… believe me.”  Even without their disclaimer, it seems like a bad idea to inhale a product with a name like that.

Why am I telling you this?  It’s such a unique and humorous name.  And, as you might guess, this makes a great (prank) gift.  🙂  I can see this being a funny choice for a “dirty Santa” gift.

Why is Roger Clemens going to the Yankees?

As many of you baseball fans know, Roger Clemens is going to pitch another partial season, and he was choosing between the Houston Astros, New York Yankees, and Boston Red Sox.  The Astros don’t have much chance of making it to the postseason this year, so they were probably eliminated for that.  Both the Red Sox and the Yankees have a good chance of making it to the playoffs.  So why did Clemens pick the Yankees over the Red Sox this year?  Some say it was because of his friends Derek Jeter and Andy Pettitte, but perhaps there was another reason : The Yankees are the only team where his five-inning starts will make him the staff ace.  🙂

Tecmo Bowl

Can you believe that on the original Nintendo (NES) was once the best football video game?  Follow that link to see a video of it.  Be sure to listen to the sound effects, too.  Clearly the graphics have not aged well.  (Or should I say “not clearly”?)  This looks pretty bad, even for NES standards.  I don’t think I’ll be getting this on the Virtual Console (on the Wii).  But watching the video clip does bring back some good memories, and it probably will for you*, too, if you ever played it.

* That is, unless you were unfortunate enough to play me at this back in the day, and you got “schooled” so bad on a regular basis that you still have emotional scars.  If this is the case, just let it go, man, because I’m the master of video games, and there’s nothing you can do about it.  🙂