the next get-rich-quick scheme

Almost everyone would like to have lots of money.  It just makes life easier.  Plus there’s some stuff I’d like to buy that just isn’t in the budget (or “spending plan”, if you prefer that terminology).  And so people look for “get rich quick” schemes, often making other people rich when falling for gimmick plans.

Well, I’ve found a readily-available substance that is more valuable than gold and diamonds.  Too good to be true, you might be thinking.  Well, it kinda is.  There’s plenty of it, but the difficulty in acquiring it is what makes it valuable.  Finding it is easy (in a way), because you can find it all around the world.  But catching some of it is quite the achievement.

So what am I talking about?  Do I even know?  😮  Yes, of course I know what I’m talking about.  It’s lunar meteorites.  Basically, that’s a fancy term for chunks of the moon.  Yep, a piece of the moon is more valuable than gold or diamonds.  Check out these stats (referencing here) :
Samples (end cuts, slabs, chips, crumbs, dust) of lunar meteorites sell on the Internet (e.g., eBay) for between about $800 and $40,000 per gram, depending upon rarity (perceived or real) and demand.  By comparison, the price of 24-carat gold is about $20 per gram and gem-quality diamonds start at $1000-2000/gram.
Obviously, the difficulty is in getting some.  It’s still quite expensive to go to the moon, and finding them in your yard is not a common thing.  Hence the high value of them.  But I’ve directed our official Buffet o’ Blog R&D department to find an affordable way to acquire some.  Even if it costs quite a bit initially, the rocks would soon pay for it.  If a gram can go for as much as $40,000, imagine how much a whole rock would be worth!

I know, some people are thinking this is impossible.  You’re just saying that because no one is doing it.  You may also be thinking it’s silly.  Well, it may be, but it’s an ingenious get-rich-quick scheme, you have to admit.  Have you ever heard this before?  I didn’t think so.

(BTW, if you want to be part of this project, send us some money and we’ll give you a cut of the riches.)  🙂

12 thoughts on “the next get-rich-quick scheme

  1. Mr. Destructo

    If a lunar fragment is worth that much, I wonder how much the whole moon would be worth, were I to bring it smashing into the earth… Or, perhaps better, how much the world would pay me to keep this from happening… 🙂

  2. Mr. Destructo

    Who is this Mr. Ego? Are you just rambling incoherently like that “Important Evil Genius E.D”? Reveal yourself!

  3. Mr. Ego

    I may be Mr. Ego, but I am NOT gonna reveal myself to anyone on this, or any other blog! I’m not that kind of blogger! Is this “Mr. Destructo” this big of a pervert all the time, just asking total strangers to reveal themselves? If he tries anything strange with me I’ll bring the moon down on his head! How do you think it got broken the first time. Some hard-headed so-and-so messed with me and suffered my wrath!

    To all you pseudo-world-dominator-wannabes out there, just try your luck with me and I’ll smash you with my ultra-high-speed moon retractor. One push of my u.h.s.m.r. button and you’ll never know what hit you and nobody else will even know what happened because the moon comes down and then back to its normal orbit at the speed of light. The only difference everyone else (aside from my unfortunate victim(s) of course) sees is a slight increase in tidal activity for about 10 minutes and dogs begin howling inexplicably. It’s like beam-me-up (and down)-Scotty on steroids! How do I crush only one person at a time, you may ask? With the on-board advanced Lunar/Global Positioning System, it’s a piece of cake. I simply punch in coordinates that will cause a very slender lunar mountain peak or rock formation to drive the victim into the ground. It’s the greatest such system out there and I own it, so watch your back (or should I say head), Mr. Destructo and all you other wack jobs out there! (Insert evil laugh here.)

  4. Evil Genius E.D.

    this mr. Ego is a whack job… how do I know? check out his statement. “How do I crush only one person at a time, you may ask? With the on-board advanced Lunar/Global Positioning System, it’s a piece of cake.” uhhh…. a lunar/global positioning system made of cake? preposterous… that’s the dumbest thing I ever heard. I suppose the white straigt-jacket that you’re made to wear is REALLY a thermal-dynamic armament used to shield ‘the voices’ in your head from the ‘others’ I say go eat your cake and play with your pudding. Leave the world domination to the experts. sheesh… amateur!!!

  5. Mr. Ego

    The “it’s a piece of cake” comment was a metaphor meaning “it is very easy”. Perhaps you should get out more. Or maybe you’re just so dumb that I should call you “Captain Literal” because you don’t understand metaphorical language. That being the case, I should take back my last statement about you being dumb because as we all know, that means that one can’t speak. I should then state for the record that rather than dumb, you’re mentally challenged, stupid, and in all other ways, inept.

    Please don’t let your jealousy destroy you! Nonsense talk about straight-jackets and voices in the head are quite juvenile and have little meaning to me. But I have destroyed nut-jobs, excuse me, mentally ill people, for much less, just for fun. So, if you don’t want to become my “play thing” (the quotes around “play thing” indicates that this is figurative terminology, meaning “a victim completely at my mercy, of which I have very little), you’ll stop the silly jealous nonsense.

  6. Mr. Ego

    Please accept my apology, Captain Literal. We’ve been allies for many years and I wouldn’t want to screw things up with you, uh, I mean jeopardize our camaraderie. I’ll never forget your technical help on the U.H.S.M.R.

  7. Evil Genius E.D. Says

    Mr. Ego i’d be careful about calling names if I were you. besides what kind of name is Ego anyway? sounds as if you were named after a waffle (aka eggo)

    Captain Literal… go jump in a lake… note this is NOT a metaphore. 🙂

  8. Jason

    Well, You guys sound fat, smart, and single. It sums up most people who troll these off-topic boards. You ask how did I get here without being fat, smart and single? Well I guess Icehouse did it for me while trying to be fat, smart and well, last part doesn’t fit the profile. I was just searching for moon dust and how much it was worth, and how it could make me rich. Well, as I thought it doesn’t 😉 Anyways, have a good day, and as usually after the beer wears off, I’ll be a totally different person again.

    Take care, and continue your funny conversation 🙂

  9. Mr. Ego

    For Captain Literal: By “Icehouse”, he means a name-brand of an alcholic beverage or beer, not an actual storage facility for frozen water. And when he said “when the beer wears off”, he didn’t mean he was actually wearing the beer at the time. He just means he’ll be a different acting person when the neurological effects of the alcohol have been expelled through the body’s natural processes.

    For Evil Genius, E.D.: It’s quite fortunate for you that the word “Genius” appears in your name, because that is the only way that word would be found in the same sentence as your name. From what I hear on the street and read on this obscure blog, you’re not all that bright. In fact, from what I can tell, you’re a washed up old has-been! Yes, you should consider this an insult you wicked wannabe! 🙂

    For Jason: Your observations are pretty good, but not 100% accurate. Many of us are of the overweight category. I especially am very smart, as are some of the others, although some so-called “geniuses” on this blog are total nimrods. 🙂 And, we’re mostly all married, but we have that loveable single feel, in that we like to act stupid with our buddies and talk smack just to let off some steam. Excuse me, but I need to go let off some steam right now. Phvvvvvvvvvvvrrrrrrt!!!

  10. Mr. Destructo

    For Jason: Who are you calling a troll? Most of the rest of us here are regulars on this site, while you come in and talk about consuming alcohol and being fat. Who’s being off-topic? Besides, we were all talking about the moon, which is the topic of this post. So how is this an “off-topic board”? Do you even know where you are? This is Buffet o’ Blog, a world-renown humor blog, replete with original randomness and humor.

    Perhaps you didn’t understand the post, either. If you can acquire some moon dust, it can make you rich. But maybe you just thought you had some due to the influence of alcohol.

    FYI, I’m not fat. Through my rigorous exercise routine, I’ve developed the strength of a grizzly and the reflexes of a puma.

    For Mr. Ego: Just as I thought, you’re full of hot air. There you go releasing pressure again. MUWAHAHAHA!

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