slide from bedroom to swimming pool

The other day I was talking with someone who also would like to have a pool for exercise (as well as general enjoyment).  It’s no-impact and thus low-stress on your joints, so it’s great for exercise, especially when recovering from injury.

We talked about how great it would be to have an indoor pool, where you could open it up to the outside in good weather.  Then I remembered this picture of an indoor pool with a slide from an upstairs bedroom.  I had heard Mike Tyson had something like this in his house, but I haven’t found any evidence of that.  This is a 3D rendering from house plans other than his.

We discussed how awesome such a setup would be, and someone joked that Tyson had the slide from his bedroom to the pool so he could escape quickly from tax collectors.  (And here’s where the randomness begins, so hold on for the ride.)  The pool could’ve had a secret tunnel to the outside.  A neat way to quickly escape would be to have a giant pump to drain the pool to an outside location.

If you’ve got a giant pool that can be flushed, and there’s a slide from your bedroom to the pool, and you’ve got many millions of dollars to waste, you could have the pool be a giant toilet.  Just picture it — you crawl out of bed, have to go urinate, so you go down the slide, pee in the pool, and hit the big flush button.  This would be wasting thousands of gallons of water just to flush the toilet, but this is all about being over-the-top extravagant and wasteful.

This story is already kinda random, but this discussion was happening late at night, so it kept going.  If you’re using the pool as a giant toilet, you might poop in there sometimes.  Picture an Olympic-sized swimming pool, water swirling, with the poop being the last part to go down.  It would take several minutes.  If someone was coming over to visit and would be using the pool, you might have to distract them while it flushed.  Otherwise they might think you had squirrels or beavers in the pool.  It would also take a while to refill a big pool, so you might need your own water tower on your property.  (It’s just money, right?)

The story continued, involving squirrels eating corn, but it’s probably not as funny reading it as it was at the time, so I’ll stop there.  Feel free to continue the rambling if you think of something.

Oh, and there was also a comment that there might be protesters outside the premises because of the immense wastefulness.  (Of course you’d have a big fence and gate, as rich people do.)  Someone said when it was time to wash the protesters off the sidewalk, you could use the water from the pool to flush the sidewalks clean.  🙂  (How’s that for recycling?)

another funny video

It’s nice to get feedback from the regular readers, to know what we’re doing right and what could be better.   Well, just the other day, Mango-Man suggested we post more funny videos, maybe even making it a recurring theme like our caption contests.  That’s not a bad idea.  We’ve linked to some great videos before, like Tunak Tunak Tun and Shingo Mama no Oha Rock! (which someone claimed as the best YouTube video) and part of a movie featuring Superman and a female Spiderman working together.  All classic stuff…

So here’s another funny video.  Normally I would explain it first, but this one is better if you watch it first.  It’s only 2:41 long, so go ahead and watch it, and then we can discuss it afterward.

Did you watch it yet?   You’ll enjoy it more if you watch it before knowing what it is.  🙂

If you don’t know, that is the infamous Toilet Stool Rap (T.S.R.) by the one and only Biz Markie.   Yeah, it’s a rap about having to poop, along with writing rhymes while on the can.  They don’t make rap like this anymore…

a discommodious definition

While reading product descriptions online, I came across a word I wasn’t very familiar with and it sounded out-of-place.  The word was discommodiously.  It is an actual word, but it doesn’t mean what it sounds like.  I mentioned this word to Mango-Man, and he didn’t have to look it up to suggest a definition:

Discommodiously sounds like something you do while on the can!  🙂

Usage: After eating all those bean burritos last night I had to rush to the restroom and use the toilet quite discommodiously!

The word actually means “to cause inconvenience or annoyance to; disturb”, so it kind of fits his example.  On second thought, when Mango-Man uses my restroom, it does cause inconvenience and annoyance because the paint peels off the walls!  So maybe he does know what he’s talking about!

So I nominate discommodious as the word of the week.  Use it any chance you get, to add more flavor and spice to your conversations.

surprised by a toilet

How many times have you ever been surprised by a toilet?  And of those times, how many were something neat?

Mango-Man told us he saw a once-in-a-lifetime sight recently.  He was driving home for lunch, and a toilet fell out the back of someone’s truck.  Try to picture that!  He said it shattered and went everywhere.  Too bad he didn’t get to capture it on video.  That’s something you don’t see every day…