deep-fried dollar bill

Ah, America… The land of deep-fried excess!  🙂  (Is this poetic or ironic?)

This picture was forwarded among the Buffet o’ Blog staff, and one person said, “That’s a waste of perfectly good breading.”  So true.  Because there’s no way I’d eat a dollar bill, even if cooked.  I don’t even want to think of how many germs it could have on it.  (I hope they threw out the grease after it was cooked!)

Then someone wondered: “Would the dollar be worth more now that it’s fried?”  That is an interesting question.  In general, the dollar isn’t worth what it used to be.  (Think about that for a while… but don’t hurt yourself.)  This version is a novelty.  I bet there is someone who would pay more than $1 for it.  I suppose that would make it worth more than $1, at least to a small percentage of people.

Technically, it’s illegal to deface U.S. currency.  (So before inquiring minds want to know, I don’t know who made this picture.)  I wonder if it’s illegal to make a dollar bill be more valuable.  I suppose so, from a legal standpoint, but that seems counter-intuitive.  But not like it matters — I’m not planning to deep-fry any dollar bills.  I’ve got bigger fish to fry…

Is it illegal to pass gas?

Is it illegal to pass gas?  Usually not, as far as I know, but a man named Jose Cruz found out otherwise.  This week, in South Charleston, West Virginia, Cruz was arrested for driving under the influence (DUI).  When police were trying to get his fingerprints back at the station, he passed gas on an officer.  Here’s what was filed in the official police report:

During processing Ptlm. Cook was taking the defendant’s fingerprints while Ptlm. Parsons was typing data into the Intoximeters 5000 machine.  Ptlm. Parsons was in a chair approx. 4-5 feet away from the fingerprinting station.   The defendant scooted the 4 feet to Ptlm. Parsons, away from officer Cook, and lifted his leg and passed gas loudly on Ptlm. Parsons.   Then defendant then fanned the air with his hand in front of his rear onto Ptlm. Parsons.   The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature with Ptlm. Parsons.

Ironically, he next had to take the breath test, and he couldn’t give a sufficient sample because he was having trouble breathing.  🙂

For doing all that, they charged him with “battery on an officer” and “obstructing an officer”.  I realize no one wants to be farted on, but is it really a criminal offense?   Did the officer think it was chemical warfare?   (Maybe it’s psychological warfare.)  Two days later, police dropped the charges relating to his flatulence.

Although, now that I think about it, the police were just trying to maintain law and odor.  🙂