you can help us prevent hurricanes

A while back I wrote an article about how to prevent hurricanes.  It’s been a really popular post lately, and for good reason — Hurricane Isaac was recently causing a swath of destruction along its path through the southern U.S.

Hurricane Isaac in 2012

The article explained some ways to prevent hurricanes, but there has been a noticeable lack of funds coming in.  So obviously investors either haven’t found it, or they didn’t take it seriously.  I realize the presentation could’ve been made in a more “professional” manner.  It started off with some rambling (also known as digressing), and some of the ideas were intentionally over-the-top for fun.  But I make no apologies for the format — this is a humor blog, after all.  Even when legitimate ideas are released into the blogosphere, they are accompanied with humor.  That’s just how I roll.  (Well, I do have a serious blog, and it could’ve went there, but then I would’ve had to edit out the randomness, and what’s the fun in that?)

The last idea was actually somewhat viable, though.  It could make a difference in so many ways.  Obviously we wouldn’t cover the entire Sahara desert with solar panels, but we’d have to make only a something-eight percent difference to improve the current status quo.  And as the post explains, this would reduce global warming AND save money from hurricane damages AND be a clean, green, unlimited, renewable energy solution.  So what’s the problem?  All we need is appropriate funding (and by appropriate I mean a LOT, like billions of dollars), but it would pay for itself many times over.

There may be some people who worry about tampering with Mother Nature, and there are valid concerns to address, but we’ve been doing it for years already.  If things do change for the negative somehow, people will just blame labels like “Global Warming” and “Climate Change” (partly because it gives them political power and enables them to raise taxes with the cleverly named “Cap and Trade”, but I’d better not rant on that or I will surely digress).  Besides, there are solar panels already installed in the southwest U.S., and nobody complains about that changing the weather.

It’s important that we focus on the key initiative here, and that is to solve numerous global problems at once.  Well, that and make billions of dollars in profit.  But as the saying goes, it takes money to make money.  And it takes money to save the world, unless you’ve got super powers like Superman.  However none of us are Superman, and as far as I know, no one on the Buffet o’ Blog staff has any of the super powers of Superman (or we’d know, because it would be awesome to use them).  So we need investment funding, which is another way of saying “send us your money”.  We’ll send you an official certificate saying you contributed to saving the world.  Plus you’ll feel all warm and toasty inside, and you’ll help extend the life of the Earth, and you can’t put a dollar value on that.

new music that’s funny and random

I recently heard about a new music album that is both funny and random, so naturally it’s a good fit for this blog.  The album is called “Bringin’ da Phat”, by DJ Turbo-Lax and MC Refried Breeze.  That should tell you something about it right there.  (I tell ya, you can find anything on the Internet!)  As you might surmise by the artist names, the songs have random acts of flatulence in them.  So that automatically divides the audience.  If you get offended by such things, you’ve been forewarned.  But if you can laugh at farting, you might hurt yourself laughing at these songs.

I listen to a lot of music, but I must admit I’ve never heard anything like this before.  The beat changes often, jumping between genres at will.  You will be surprised.  The vocal phrases and utterings combined with the sound effects are hilarious.  So perhaps it’s “toilet humor”, but it’s clean, other than the resulting skid marks.  Some of the beats jam, too.

You can listen to it for free at Spotify, although you have to install the player if you haven’t already.  It’s also available for purchase at eMusic, Amazon, and iTunes.  Of course you can listen to samples of the tracks on those last 3 sites.

Regarding the album art, yeah, it might be a low-budget production, but the sound quality is good, and in addition to hearing a cornucopia of beats, it will make you laugh.  Not many songs can say that.

So if you can stomach this kind of humor, I recommend checking it out.

a conversation going downhill

Someone on the Buffet o’ Blog staff recently forwarded an e-card that sparked an interesting chain of e-mails:

Of course such a statement will not go unchallenged, and that’s what amped up this conversation.  (Besides the fun of it, we have to keep each other humble…)  Someone replied with “That gives me gas…”  So then someone modified the picture to reflect the next phase:

And it was said that that picture is what the original sender should have sent out the first time.  So that just provoked further modification:

That’s just wrong… funny, but wrong.  Found out later it was supposed to say “bad case”, but it works either way.  Then someone replied, “It looks like somebody supersized your order of butt nuggets.”  I was kinda afraid of the conversation continuing down that road…  I’m not exactly sure what a butt nugget is, but I’m sure I don’t want any part of it!

This whole exchange reminded me of a quote:

A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction into a battle of wits and add drama to an otherwise dull day.

That’s exactly what happened here.

why it’s so hot

Here in Arkansas, it’s been over 100 degrees every day, and it was for much of June, too (which is not normal and ain’t right).  In case you’re wondering why, here’s a picture that was taken today.

Apparently the Earth is about 12 feet from the Sun now.  That must explain why it’s crazy-mad hot now.