I watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer the other day, which is an awesome show. It’s part of my Christmas tradition. I used to feel like a misfit, so I can relate. Now I’m awesome, just like the show works out for our misfit friends.
One part of the show that always amuses me is Mrs. Claus telling Santa Claus, “Eat! Eat! Whoever heard of a skinny Santa?” Now that’s the kind of job I need! Of course Santa has other major responsibilities, like overseeing toy production and delivering toys, but that wouldn’t take up too much time. The rest of his time is devoted to being fat.
What would you think if part of your job requirement was being overweight? Could you handle that?
With Santa, it’s cool that he’s fat. (Yet he’s in good shape, since he has the endurance to travel the world in one night and deliver billions of toys.) With Santa, people like it that he’s overweight. Think about the poem “Twas the Night Before Christmas”, where it says:
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly!
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself!
For most of us, if our belly shakes when we laugh, people look down on that. But with Santa, it’s cool.
So with all that in mind, I’ve decided I want to be Santa Claus when I grow up.
I ate at Chili’s tonight with a couple of guys, and as we were examining the menu, one guy noticed some mini burgers and asked about them. None of us had tried them, but judging by the picture it looked like these had more bread than meat. I said I prefer my burgers to have more meat than bread, and this prompted one guy to say:
I like to get fat the right way. ~ Matt B.
That’s classic… And he is of robust size, a meat-and-taters type of guy. And he did make a valid point — if you’re gonna be overweight, you should enjoy it. You don’t want to get fat from salads (which can happen if you use salad dressing).
Apparently some people really enjoy being fat. There are a number of bloggers who call themselves “gainers” and document their quest to get fatter. One blogger named Peter is 5’8″ and 250 pounds, and he is trying to gain more weight. He has said:
“I love how my weight feels when I run, falling and shaking my body shortly after each step… The only thing I love more than being fat, is getting fatter.”
Uhh… He has also explained that “it feels natural to be fat”. I don’t know about that, but I have experienced weight gain myself, and it was all natural. I didn’t have to take any supplements or follow any special non-workout routines. It just happened.
Peter has also said:
“I talk with many men who are much larger than I am, about their bodies and why they grew so large. They talk about the satisfaction of being full like some people talk about how good they feel after a hard workout or something. Being fat is just what makes them happy.”
Here’s where I think he’s confused (among other things) — I can understand the satisfaction of being full. When I demolish a pizza buffet and then sit around talking with my friends, it feels good. That feeling does make you happy. But being fat doesn’t make me happy. That’s the difference. I’m slightly overweight because I love to eat, but I don’t like being fat. I enjoy playing sports, and hiking, and being able to go places that require walking, without being out of breath all the time.
It’s possible to eat a lot and not be fat, if you maintain a high metabolism. Then you get to enjoy eating AND enjoy physical activities. I realize some people may not care about physical activities, so being in good health may not matter so much to them. But when people get to the point that they get out of breath from tying their shoes, I don’t see how that’s enjoyable. And then there’s the added health issues of being obese, which aren’t fun at all.
So my conclusion (not that you asked, but you’re still reading), is that it’s not fun to be fat. But it is very enjoyable to eat, as evidenced by the numerous food conversations we have had here on this blog, particularly our Buffet o’ Bacon series.
According to cutting-edge research, it is actually healthy to have a fat butt. That sounds like something crazier than I would ever even make up, but it’s the gist of an article I happened to find on a news website.
For all the people with fat around their stomach, that’s totally unhealthy, unfortunately. I’ll have to keep looking for some cutting-edge research that finds a way to explain how that’s somehow healthy…
(BTW, I’ve heard blogging professionals say you should include pictures with your posts, to increase interest. I try to do that sometimes. But I think this post is an exception. You should be thankful I realized that…)