We are pleased the announce the immediate availability of official Buffet o’ Blog gift certificates, just in time for Christmas!  They make a great gift!  And for a limited time, we are giving them away free!  (While supplies last.)

In the interest of full disclosure, our online store is temporarily closed (until we have something worth selling).  That’s why we’re giving them away for free.  But they still make a great gift.  It will be at no cost to you, and it will provide hours of fun for the recipient.  (If you feel guilty about giving a free gift, we do accept donations.)  The recipient is guaranteed to enjoy it, provided they follow the terms of the agreement by visiting the site.

Here are some examples of what people can expect to find at our site :

• original humor (made fresh daily)
• a sprinkling of news commentary, chock-full of randomness
• our nearly-infamous viewer mail
• new products and ideas (like a shampoo that helps you get dates, a great movie idea, helping you stop smoking, improving golf, etc.)
• original, free-for-all stories (which are guaranteed to not be predictable)
• random quotes
• opportunities for participation (in the comments section, you can join in the fun)

Why would we offer such a great deal?  We like to give — that’s why the site is free (with no ads, even!).  Also, this gains exposure for us, which is a good thing.  Our advertising budget was spent at Taco Bell the other night, so we aren’t getting a lot of promotion.  And since you enjoy the site (don’t deny it — you are here reading it right now), you can help support us for free, while making other people happier (which is something we aim to do).  Making other people laugh makes the world a better place, and we should all do our part.

Women usually plan weddings and men are usually okay with that.  But, for humor’s sake, let’s consider some ways men would make a wedding different to make it more fun.  (Kudos to Larry Sessions for the idea.)  Larry suggested the groom (or bride) could ride in on a tractor or four-wheeler, and that guests could use some type of leaf-blower to shoot rice into the air and/or at the wedding party as they leave.  Picture that… 🙂

One of my other friends made a humorous statement about his wedding, how he wanted it to be different, and it applies to this conversation :

To expect a “perfect” wedding is to court disappointment.  The wedding should be full of adventure and intrigue, like the marriage.  I secretly hoped for a Spanish army on horseback to ride in the church and demand 300 pesos. ~ Jared Stewart, 3/11/05

Suppose you could get away with anything at your wedding — and your wife wouldn’t care.  Anything…  (but keep it clean).  What would you do?  (Let the imagination soar…)

Yesterday my breakfast left me hungry, and I wasn’t sure what to do, so I e-mailed the “Important Doctor” who frequents this blog :

Dear Important Doctor,

My breakfast today consisted of a light-n-fit strawberry-banana yogurt cup, which had only 40 calories and 0g fat.  Is this sufficient for breakfast?

P.S. I noticed some Hostess Ding Dongs in the vending machine… would they be a viable supplement?

He quickly replied and said :

HURRY… before you faint… PER “important” Doctor’s orders… go & eat a Hostess Ding Dong immediately… You need to partake of multiple trans-fats post haste… thereby decreasing the viscosity in your veins… This “gets the blood flowing better” and starts your morning off right…

Well, I didn’t then, but today I didn’t have time for any breakfast, so I visited the vending machine to get a package of Hostess Ding Dongs.  They sure are good!  Chocolate filled with creamy white goodness.

I have to agree with Thomas Wayne that the “Important Doctor” is probably a big fraud.  (And if he’s on that bacon & cheese “diet” he talks of, he probably is very big.)  Nonetheless, I ate one of those Hostess Ding Dongs, and they sure are good!