Recently I was on vacation in Branson, and one day the women were shopping at the different outlet malls. Every time I find myself in this situation, I wonder why someone doesn’t open a store for men. There is occasionally a tools store, but I still don’t want to spend all day there. Even if I were to shop for clothes, it wouldn’t take very long. (That’s just one of the areas where men and women are generally different.)
What I’m thinking of is a place where you can rent recliners for naps or to watch sports or play video games and/or eat nachos. I think there’s a market for it. I could justify spending a few dollars to do that while women look at clothes for hours. Maybe we should open one — I’m certain we could make it awesome.
We could also sell new versions of the equipment in there — TVs, game consoles, games, recliners, etc., and have it delivered. And we could sell off the used equipment at discount when it’s time to replace it. If people can play video games, you’d surely sell some of them. If necessary, you could occasionally show ads targeted at men, like for sports cars, tools, video games, action movies, flamethrowers, etc. Ideally you wouldn’t have to show ads, but still, I could tolerate a few if it meant spending a few hours watching sports or playing video games instead of sitting around.
Plants play an important role in preventing global warming, because they absorb carbon dioxide (CO^2) and convert it into oxygen via photosynthesis. Well, I’ve heard that global warming is on the rise because of too much carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. So this obviously means that plants aren’t doing their job. I mean, that’s the main task of plants, right? I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to eat them (although animals do, which is important, I reckon), so their main purpose of existence is to convert carbon dioxide into oxygen.
Since plants obviously aren’t fulfilling their basic life requirements, it’s time to take action. I’m going to start suing greenhouses and plant outlets who are selling us defective plants and shrubberies and trees. You may think this is crazy (and maybe it is), but hear me out. Mother Nature has taken care of Earth for thousands of years. Plants always did their job, and life continued on as it was designed to. But in recent years, there have been stores that sold us plants, some of which were genetically mutated and stuff. Obviously that’s why the plants are malfunctioning.
Someone has to hold these places accountable. I should’ve seen this a long time ago. The grass in the field behind my house grows just fine naturally, but when my yard was sodded for the first time, the grass didn’t grow well at all. Why? Because it was bought from a store. And that’s not all — my wife got some flowers from the store and planted them, and they died not too long after that. They were even watered extra beyond what the rain naturally sends, yet they died. That’s just not acceptable. That’s causing us to spend more money, and now I learned that the early death of these plants can contribute to global warming! I shudder to consider how many people buy plants and shrubberies that die before their time, and now there’s too many greenhouse gases in the atmosphere. What is this world coming to?