the ultimate burger

One of our resident food experts here at Buffet o’ Blog was thinking about ways to improve the standard cheeseburger.  Not that it necessarily needs improving, but if you can make it even better, why not?  So here, in layer form, is his masterpiece:

Bun
Cheese
Breaded Chicken Patty
Sauce (BBQ, ranch, ketchup, Miracle Whip, whatever)
Bacon
Burger
Cheese
More Bacon
Sauce
Ham
Cheese
Bun

Maybe we should add another bun in the middle, just for structural support.  I think cheese is the only thing holding it together.  But if it gets much larger, you’d need to unhinge your jaw like a python just to eat it.  (Maybe that would be a good marketing slogan : “So much burger, you’ll have to unhinge your jaw.”)

What do you think?  Is this the ultimate burger, or can you think of something better?

selling a permanent vacation

I saw a commercial from a company that sells timeshares, and as part of their promotional offer, they said:

“Wouldn’t it be great if you could make your vacation last the rest of your life?”

Yeah, of course it would!  Who wouldn’t buy that?  But of course they aren’t really offering that.  They want to sell you a place you can go on vacation that’s always there.  Although, you can’t go at any time or an unlimited amount, because you’re sharing it with other people in the program.

If you think about it, there are nearly endless vacation opportunities that are always there, whether you buy into this program or not.  Granted, their plan might be good if you want to go to their places on a regular basis, but that particular commercial was misleading.  If they were selling me a vacation that lasted the rest of my life, I’d buy it!  That’s like selling someone an early retirement.  If I could quit working and just vacation all I wanted to, I would, and I wouldn’t have to buy their program to do it.

If someone could sell an early retirement, that would be a highly desired product, because everyone wants that.  But, it would be crazy expensive, and the people who could afford it are the ones who can already afford to retire early…

how to eat a chicken sandwich

Today I was out on the town during the lunch hour, so I stopped by Chick-fil-A to get a chicken sandwich.  (Is there a better chicken sandwich?  That is, getting it without pickles and adding cheese and mayo.)  Anyway, I’ve always eaten it with my hands, because that’s what you do with sandwiches.  But the woman at the drive-thru window put a straw in my bag, even though I didn’t order a beverage.  What was that for?  Did she expect me to use the straw to drink my sandwich?  Silly woman… straws are for beverages!

add your own captions, Bill Clinton speaking for Hillary

It’s time for another caption contest! I’m going to go with the political theme once again, mainly because I have this picture of Bill Clinton speaking on behalf of Hillary Clinton’s 2008 campaign for president, and now her campaign has derailed.  So I need to use it while the story is still somewhat relevant.  Plus, there’s some potential humor with this picture.

Like before, you get to write the caption for this photo, from whichever perspective you want to.  Have fun!

Bill Clinton speech for Hillary\'s campaign

(To see the other entries in our caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)