On Sunday, there were two major-league baseball games where a pitcher walked a batter with the bases loaded.  Cubs relievers walked the bases loaded, then hit the next guy to bring in the winning run in the 11th inning.  And Yankees reliever Scott Proctor issued two walks with the bases loaded — to tie the game, then to give away the lead.  And both teams proceeded to lose the game, as they should when walking someone with the bases loaded.

Why do managers let this happen?  I know I’m not alone in thinking that it’s never a good idea to walk someone with the bases loaded.  I’d pull any reliever who already walked two in an inning.  But if a pitcher walked someone with the bases loaded, I’d pull him immediately.  There’s no excuse.  It forces in a run.  Even if you have to throw it down the middle, there’s at least a chance that the hitter will miss it or hit it at someone.  But when you walk them, the chance of them scoring is 100%.

Here’s what a manager should do.  He should keep himself in shape, practice his pitching, then when a reliever implodes on the mound again, walking people with the bases loaded, the manager should go to the mound and demote that guy to Triple-A right then and there.  He could act like an umpire, making the motions for “You’re outta here!”  Then replace his spot on the roster with yourself.  Proceed to pitch out of the jam and tell your reliever, “This is how it should be done!”

If the manager is just too old to pitch, he could arrange to have someone in the stands behind their dugout who he knows can pitch.  When you pull your pitcher out of the game, go grab that guy out of the stands and bring him into the game, putting him in.  And of course don’t let anyone know that you rigged it.  This way it’ll look like you just pulled a random person out of the stands who can pitch better than the guy you just took out.  That’ll teach him to walk people with the bases loaded!  Plus it’ll create lots of publicity for yourself and the team.

Someone told me about a uniquely-named product : Anti Monkey Butt Powder.  It’s for people who get chafed from activities like motorcycling, bicycling, horseback riding, etc.  It absorbs sweat and reduces friction and irritation.  The name comes from the monkeys with exposed buttocks.  Apparently some people use this term to describe chafing and soreness, but I’ve never heard it around here.

This is a real product, not something we imagined.  It is manufactured by Anti Monkey Butt Corporation.  (How is that for a unique name? Imagine putting that on your business card…)  Amazon.com even sells this product, for $5.95.  Someone in the reviews there said it “can be dangerous if inhaled… believe me.”  Even without their disclaimer, it seems like a bad idea to inhale a product with a name like that.

Why am I telling you this?  It’s such a unique and humorous name.  And, as you might guess, this makes a great (prank) gift.  🙂  I can see this being a funny choice for a “dirty Santa” gift.

As many of you baseball fans know, Roger Clemens is going to pitch another partial season, and he was choosing between the Houston Astros, New York Yankees, and Boston Red Sox.  The Astros don’t have much chance of making it to the postseason this year, so they were probably eliminated for that.  Both the Red Sox and the Yankees have a good chance of making it to the playoffs.  So why did Clemens pick the Yankees over the Red Sox this year?  Some say it was because of his friends Derek Jeter and Andy Pettitte, but perhaps there was another reason : The Yankees are the only team where his five-inning starts will make him the staff ace.  🙂

Okay, this is quite nerdy, I must admit.  If you’re going to be critical, go on and read something else.  🙂

A company called Wonderland has made some “noisemaker” plush toys from the Super Mario Bros. series of video games.  There’s a question block and a turtle.  It would be kinda neat to hang the question block from the ceiling, so you could jump into it or punch it to make that noise of getting coins.

I have a suspicion these would have a low WAF (Wife Approval Factor), so about the only chance of married men putting these somewhere would be in a dedicated game room or maybe a workshop.