the special days of September, pt 2

I’m going to continue my analysis of the special days of September.   In this post I’ll be examining the holidays on individual days.

  • 1 Labor Day (first Monday of month) — Ironically, on a day all about labor, you get off work.   So that’s kinda weird, but I am definitely NOT complaining!
  • 2 National Beheading Day — WHAT?!?   I’m definitely not participating on this holiday!   Who came up with this?   This sounds un-American!  (It also sounds like it’s bad for your health!)
  • 5 Be Late for Something Day — Okay, here’s a holiday I can support!  This won’t even take too much effort for me.  🙂  You even get to pick what you’re going to be late to.  (Ironically, I’m late in posting this series this month, but it’s not the 5th now.)
  • 5 Cheese Pizza Day — Here’s another American-sounding holiday.  Even if you prefer your pizza to be topped with lots of dead animals (meats), surely you can still appreciate the yummy goodness of a cheese pizza.
  • 6 Fight Procrastination Day — Is it a coincidence this is the day after “Be Late for Something Day”?  I’m not sure what to think about this day… I think I’ll ponder this later…
  • 6 Read a Book Day — A comic book would count — it even has “book” in the name of it.   Like discussed in the previous post on the special days of September, there are all kinds of books out there, something for everyone.  Of course, the best book to read is the Bible, because it will change your life.
  • 7 Neither Rain nor Snow Day — Was this invented by the Post Office?   Regardless, I can guarantee it’s not going to snow here on this day.   But rain would be likely, whether from afternoon summer thunderstorms or the remnants of hurricanes which pass through here after going through the Gulf of Mexico.  (I’m in Arkansas, if you didn’t know.)
  • 8 International Literacy Day — If you’re reading this, you’re already literate.   If someone can’t read, then they can’t enjoy the rambling goodness that is Buffet o’ Blog, so you should read this to them until they learn to read.
  • 8 Pardon Day — Today you should grant and request pardons freely.   So if you go up to someone and rip a loud fart, you just have to say, “Pardon me”, and they have to pardon you and not hold it against you.
  • 9 Teddy Bear Day — There have been several holidays already about teddy bears, like hugging them, taking them to work, and going on picnics with them.  So why do they get another holiday?   I figure if you still hang out with your teddy bear, you already know he’s special.  And if you’ve outgrown your teddy bears, all these holidays for them are superfluous.
  • 10 Swap Ideas Day — I reckon this is where I share an idea with you, and you share an idea with me.   I’ll go first.  When you have a job interview, eat a bunch of Oreos just before you go in, then smile a lot.  That way they’ll be staring at your teeth and not your resume.  🙂
  • 10 T.V. Dinner Day — On this day in 1954, the first TV dinner was sold (by Swanson).  Nowadays, the TV dinner aisle at your grocery store is probably running over with healthy, non-flavored microwave meals.   I’m not necessarily against healthy meals — some people enjoy them — but let’s not forget that you want to keep everyone happy, and the average American adult is overweight, so we don’t care about that healthy nonsense.
  • 11 Patriot Day — This is also known as World Trade Center Remembrance Day.   May we never forget…
  • 11 Make Your Bed Day — Making your bed is overrated.  (Can I get a witness?)   If nobody is going to see your bed but you (and your spouse), why bother making it every day?
  • 11 No News is Good News Day — I’ve heard this phrase before, but it’s not always true.  Besides, if this was true, you could just never watch or read the news, thus ensuring it would all be good.
  • 12 Chocolate Milk Shake Day — Of the smaller holidays (meaning the ones you don’t get off work for), this has to be one of the best ones.   Milkshakes are awesome!   And I’m partial to chocolate and/or cookies and creme varieties.  I also enjoy them with malt added.  On this day, all milkshakes should be half price, so people can enjoy them more.
  • 12 National Video Games Day — There was another of this day on July 8, but it wasn’t national.  I don’t know the difference, but I won’t complain that there’s two!  For those of you who don’t appreciate video games, you just haven’t found the right ones for you.  There’s something for everyone!
  • 13 Chinese Moon Festival (15th day of 8th Lunar month) — This is one of the biggest annual holidays in China.  People take off work on this day and watch the moon.   This holiday even goes back thousands of years (to when they worshiped the moon).  People also make and eat mooncakes on this day.
  • 13 Defy Superstition Day — I defy it every day.   I’m not superstitious at all.   In fact, it’s bad luck to be superstitious.
  • 13 Fortune Cookie Day — I’d like to learn to make my own fortune cookies, so I could put my own custom messages in it.  As you can imagine, it would be quite random.   Here’s a few examples: “If a scruffy-looking fellow who you’ve never seen before comes up and offers you a very strange-looking raisin muffin, it’s a good idea to decline, in this instance.”  Also, “Today is an excellent day to fly a kite shaped like a life-sized pterodactyl.   Try to get it to hover just outside someone’s office window.”   You get the idea…
  • 13 National Peanut Day — Peanuts are good in a variety of foods / dishes / candy.  Right now I’m thinking of chocolate-covered peanuts.
  • 13 Positive Thinking Day — Repeat after me: “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and people like me.”
  • 13 Uncle Sam Day — Uncle Sam is getting old.   He was born in 1813.  Actually, I haven’t heard from him in a while.   Is he still alive?
  • 13 Scooby Doo’s Birthday — The Scooby-Doo cartoons premiered in 1969.  Scooby and “those meddlin’ kids” solved a lot of mysteries.   Those original cartoons are classics.   The newer ones just aren’t the same.
  • 14 National Pet Memorial Day (second Sunday in September) — Hmm, a memorial day for your pets.   I don’t think this is necessary, but to each their own.
  • 14 National Cream-Filled Donut Day — I’m all about a chocolate-filled donut!   Mmm…

As is usual on these special days lists, this is getting long, so I’m going to finish the list in the next post.  Click here to search for the other posts on the special days of September.

the special days of September, pt 1

As we’ve done in previous months, we’re going to look at the special days and holidays of this month.   As usual, this is not a complete list — those can be found elsewhere.   But I guarantee you will not find another list like this one.   This is not a mere list, because we add our own unique commentary and analysis.  In other words, we try to make it more fun.   And you are welcome to add to the discussion in the comments section.

Let’s get started with the month-long celebrations and observances in September:

  • Classical Music Month — I know, some people equate classical music with elevator music or new age music or Yanni, and that’s not accurate at all.   Some of it jams.   I’ve heard someone say, “People who don’t like classical music just don’t listen to it loud enough.”  There might be some truth to that.   Also, don’t forget that a lot of your action movies have classical music in them.  Take notice next time…
  • International Square Dancing Month — I’m not much into square dancing, but if it’s your thing, more power to ya.  But I do have one bit of advice which I heard on Lester “Roadhog” Moran’s album Live at the Johnny Mack Brown High School: if you change partners, be sure to change back!  Failure to revert to your original partner can cause some “disagreements”, as evidenced on Roadhog’s album.  AWW-RIGHT!
  • National Courtesy Month — Courtesy can be applied to many areas, so this is a good idea.  If there’s only one piece of fried chicken left, it’s good courtesy to offer it to me.   Or if you’re in a multi-stall public bathroom, a courtesy flush is much appreciated.  I could go on, but you get the idea…
  • National Chicken Month — Speaking of fried chicken…  There’s a lot of ways to cook chicken that is excellent.   Of course, you can’t go wrong with fried chicken.  There’s also Mexican Chicken, which is my favorite dish.   Mmm…
  • National Piano Month — More focus on music — I like it!  The piano is my favorite musical instrument.  This would be a good month to go hear a live performance, like at a local college or university, or if a professional artist is in the state.  Or if you’ve always wanted to play, start taking lessons.  (I do offer lessons, but even if you don’t learn from me, it’s a great skill to develop.)
  • National Honey Month — Supposedly honey is the only food that never spoils.   Whether that’s true or not, I just know that I like honey, especially on some warm rolls…  Mmm…
  • Self Improvement Month — Here at Buffet o’ Blog, we encourage people to laugh more, which is a form of self-improvement.  The world really needs more laughter.   If you want more meaty forms of self-improvement, check out my other blog.
  • Better Breakfast Month — I’m all for this!  Now, some health nuts may argue that this means eating a healthier breakfast, but that’s not the case here.  If that’s what the holiday’s creator wanted, he/she should’ve called it Healthier Breakfast Month.  But it’s “better”.   And the definition of “better” includes “superior to another in desirability”, which for me, would mean more bacon, sausage, eggs, biscuits and gravy, chocolate milk, etc.  There’s no need to even debate this, as far as I’m concerned.   🙂
  • National Rice Month — Most of the world eats rice on a regular basis, particularly those in poverty.  So please take a few minutes to play the Free Rice game to donate rice to those in need.   Remember, it costs you nothing but a few minutes.
  • Read-A-New-Book Month — If you don’t like reading, you just haven’t found the right books.  Even if you read humor or comic books or scientific books or historical books, there’s got to be something you’d enjoy.  Plus, reading is good for you: it stimulates (exercises) your brain, plus you learn things you didn’t know before.   And it’s good to learn, so you’ll be less ignorant.   🙂

Now let’s look at the week-long observances in September:

  • 2nd Week: International Housekeepers Week — I wish I had a housekeeper, so I didn’t have to ever do dishes and clean the bathrooms…
  • 3rd Week: National Farm Animals Awareness Week — Most of us don’t see farm animals very often anymore, at least in live form.   So when you’re eating farm animals this week, be thankful and appreciate of how tasty they are.
  • 3rd Week: National Flower Week — I know who this is for…  🙂
  • 4th Week: National Dog Week — Dogs are much better than flowers, at least to most guys…  🙂  With women, that might be debatable, although it shouldn’t be.

This list is getting considerably long, so I’m going to break it up into several posts.  Click here to search for the other posts on the special days of September.

the special days of August, pt 4

Now we will conclude our listing of the special holidays / celebrations / observances in August:

  • 20 Daydream Day — Okay, here goes…  As soon as I arrive at work, my watch emits a tone on a frequency that only I can hear with my supersonic hearing.  I press a button on it, and when it validates my fingerprint, it displays a video of the Important Evil Genius trying to rebuild his secret lair.  I sneak out of work, rip my shirt off to reveal my super pajamas, and fly away, to save the day once again, before bedtime.  (I could keep going, but you get the idea.)
  • 21 Senior Citizen’s Day — If you’re old and you know it clap your hands!  [clap, clap]  Hey, who turned out the lights?
  • 22 Be an Angel Day — Angels are supernatural beings, existing in the spiritual realm.  They are able to manifest themselves in a physical body to appear like humans.  But we are unable to be angels.
  • 23 Ride the Wind Day — That sounds cool!  (And if there’s not any wind, I reckon you’ll have to create your own…)
  • 23 National Sponge Cake Day — This sounds good, if we add some strawberries and whipped cream.
  • 23 Toast Appreciation Day — First, a toast to bread, for without bread, there could be no toast.  Now, a message from The Toast Marketing Board: Eat more toast.
  • 24 Vesuvius Day — This marks the day in 79 A.D. that Mount Vesuvius exploded in one of the largest volcanic eruptions in history.  Several Roman cities were destroyed, including Pompeii.  So why is this a holiday?
  • 24 National Peach Pie Day — Add some ice cream and this would be a good treat.
  • 24 Strange Music Day — There’s a lot of strange music out there, although you won’t hear much of it on the standard “Top 40” radio stations.  They’re too busy playing what the record companies want them to play.  But listen to an indie station (like public radio or a college station), and you might hear some unusual stuff.  You might even like some of it.  Go ahead, broaden your mind.
  • 25 National Banana Split Day — I fully support this holiday!
  • 25 Kiss and Make Up Day — If it’s that simple to make up, perhaps this is the day for getting in trouble…  🙂
  • 26 National Dog Day — On this day every year, dogs around the world unite in an attempt to conquer Earth.  Fortunately, their plan is always thwarted by fire hydrants.
  • 26 Women’s Equality Day — On this day, women should be treated equally.  🙂
  • 27 Global Forgiveness Day — Today, let’s forgive Mother Nature.  The Earth’s weather patterns are just doing what they’re setup to do; it’s nothing personal against anyone.  So don’t hold a grudge.
  • 27 Just Because Day — I’m cool, just because.  Oh, wait, that’s every day…  Um, let’s look at what one website suggests for this day: Take an unplanned day of vacation (that sounds like a great idea!); Knock on someone’s door and compliment them for their great lawn (uhh, no); Skip, don’t walk (no, how about stay in bed all morning); Buy something you don’t need (that sounds good); Jump in a puddle (maybe); Walk backwards (no).  That started out well, but then the ideas became less inspired.  Anyway, you get the idea.  Do something “just because”.
  • 28 Dream Day — I had a weird dream the other day.  I was at the house of a famous Christian singer, and he was fixing lunch, and the other guys in his band were loading hay bales, and another famous artist (from a completely different musical genre) showed up, then some friends came, and then I woke up.  It was a cool dream, but weird.
  • 29 More Herbs, Less Salt Day — Uhh, what?  Why is this a holiday?
  • 29 Blame Everything on The One-Armed Man Day — Okay, this one is definitely obscure.  The reference is to a TV show called “The Fugitive”, and the final episode aired August 29, 1967.  I’ve heard this phrase used in pop culture before, though.  So today, I’m not going to work, and I’m going to blame it on the one-armed man.  This is also a good day to do pranks and pass the blame.  Just make sure there’s not a one-armed man in the building, or he’s gonna have a really bad day!
  • 30 Frankenstein Day — Is this the day that we become mad scientists and create our own monster?  I hope so, because I’ve always wanted to do that.
  • 30 Toasted Marshmallow Day — They’re good by themselves, or you can make s’mores with them.  Speaking of marshmallows, I had a dream about them one time.  I was sitting around the campfire, and I was toasting the biggest marshmallow I’d ever seen, then I started eating it.  When I woke up, my pillow was gone…
  • 30 Organize Something in Your Home Day — This sounds like work, so let’s find a loophole.  It just says “something”, which could mean anything, so how about this — I’ll organize my video game collection according to which titles I like best, which means I need to play them all to properly sort them.  🙂
  • 31 National Trail Mix Day — This is probably about the snacks, but that’s boring; let’s see, I bet if we think creatively enough we can find some ambiguosity to run with.  How about this: on this day, mix up the signs on mountain hiking trails.  Then later in the day, at the starting point, leave a sign that says, “Surprise! This is National Trail Mix Day!”  Then the hikers will know it was all a joke, and they can laugh about being lost for hours.  🙂

I hope you found something you could celebrate this month.  I know I did.

Click here to find the other entries for August.

the special days of August, pt 3

It’s time to continue our look at the special days / holidays / observances of August:

  • 10 Lazy Day — Here’s your excuse to be lazy this day.  Put off your chores another day — they’ll still be there tomorrow.  Take time to do whatever you want to do.  (And here’s an important note: if cleaning is what you actually want to do, it doesn’t mean your spouse wants to.  Just thought I’d throw that in there, for no particular reason.)
  • 10 National S’mores Day — You don’t need a campfire to make these — a microwave will do.  And you don’t need a recipe, either — just mix graham crackers, marshmallows, and chocolate.  You should make a lot of them, to hone your own personal recipe and get it just right.  And you should invite me over to help you taste-test them.  🙂
  • 11 Presidential Joke Day — This is not a day to make jokes about our President.  It’s actually a day for them to make jokes.  It started on August 11, 1984, when President Ronald Reagan was about to make a speech.  He was testing the microphone, thinking it was off, and said, “My fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed legislation which outlaws Russia forever.  The bombing begins in five minutes.”  This became quite the joke because he was speaking to a live feed!
  • 11 Play in the Sand Day — I wish I was near a beach.  There’s some sand pits in various parks nearby, but there are also cats and dogs that roam those areas, and so I’d rather not play in what may be someone’s litterbox.
  • 13 International Left-Hander’s Day — On this day, lefties have rights!  🙂  Otherwise, lefties never do anything right.  🙂
  • 13 National Filet Mignon Day — Sounds like I need to visit a steakhouse on this day!  Since it’s a holiday, this particular cut of steak should be discounted, so more people can afford them and appreciate their yummy goodness.  And the filet mignon should be bacon-wrapped.  Mmm… mmm… mmm…
  • 13 Comic Book Hero Day — Comic books should get more respect.  Many of the most popular superheroes featured in movies these days got their start in comics, and their story is still being written.  The movie version is just a brief summary of all the detail that is in the original story.  And lest you think comics are bought only by 13-year-olds, the U.S. market for comics is between $660 and $700 million.  Worldwide, comic books are perhaps the most widely read literary format.  That’s not small potatoes…  (So don’t be a “hater” or say that they’re just for “little boys”.)
  • 14 National Creamsicle Day — This sounds like a good plan, and it’s an appropriate treat considering how crazy-mad hot it typically is in the middle of August.
  • 14 Yukon Discovery Day — The name of this day reminds me of Yukon Cornelius, from the Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer claymation Christmas “cartoon”.  He was awesome!  He was the self-proclaimed “greatest prospector in the North”, always searching for silver and gold.
  • 15 Relaxation Day — This is different from being lazy.  Here, you’re resting and relaxing because you should.  It’s important to have down-time for your body to recover from all the stuff you do.  So relax, sit down a spell, and drink some tea.
  • 16 National Tell a Joke Day — I’ve thought about becoming a stand-up comedian.  It started when I was a kid, and I told my parents I wanted to be a comedian, and they just laughed at me.
  • 16 International Homeless Animals Day — Did you know most animals are homeless?  Well, not really, because they find or create homes, but I mean that most animals don’t live with humans.  Besides, animals are naturally homeless.
  • 16 Roller Coaster Day — On this day in 1898, the roller coaster was patented.  The popularity of roller coasters has been going up and down since.
  • 18 Bad Poetry Day — At first glance, this kind of holiday seems obscure and useless, but I know of a few people (who happen to be regular readers here) who seem to enjoy writing bad poetry.  (That is, “bad” meaning poorly composed and consisting of mostly bad puns.)
  • 19 National Potato Day — Some also call this French Fry Appreciation Day.  Either way, it’s good stuff.  Did you know that potatoes are actually vegetables?  So I can’t say I dislike all vegetables.  Taters are good in just about all forms: baked, mashed, smashed, and fried.  (My brother used to say, “Everybody loves soft-fried taters.”)  Just don’t make potato salad, which isn’t a food.

Once again, this list is getting long, so I’ll finish the rest of the month in the next post.  Click here to find the other entries in this list.