the hottest place in America

Where is the hottest place in the United States of America?  Want to guess?  Reasonable guesses would include southern Florida, Arizona, and southern Texas.   Normally those places are contenders and one would probably be correct.  But if you live in the area which is the correct answer (as I do), you know.  Today the answer is central Arkansas.  Is that inconceivable?  I have the maps to prove it.

Those pinkish-white areas represent “crazy-mad hot”.

Why is central Arkansas the hottest place in the country?  We have excessive amounts of humidity, too!  We’ve been under a “heat advisory” for most of the past few weeks, but now we’re under an “excessive heat warning”, because the heat index may reach 120.   On TV The Weather Channel said the heat index in central Arkansas could reach 125 today.  I’m pretty sure we weren’t designed to operate in such extreme temperatures.

But why is this happening?  Is the weather broken?  I know, it’s easy to blame Global Warming.  But last winter we had snow more often than I can remember in one winter.  And last summer was the mildest summer I could remember.   (And my memory extends back quite a few years.)  So what’s going on?  Who’s tampering with the weather patterns?

If we get politicians involved in the discussion, it will be the usual story — blame the other party, or blame Bush.  (I’ve heard someone on CNN blame Bush for wildfires in California one time, believe it or not.)  What we need is a solution.  Fortunately, we’ve already had this discussion.   Now we just need someone to make it happen.  (While ice cream sandwiches might not solve the problem, they sure would make it more bearable.)  The case for this can be framed in many potential voting demographics — the heat is dangerous to children, to the elderly, to the unemployed who can’t afford their cooling bills, to illegal immigrants forced to work outside in unfair conditions, etc.  You get the idea.  So call your state representatives and tell them it’s too hot and we have a solution!

truck racing commercial for ESPN

TV commercials can be an art form.  Most aren’t, unless you consider crap art.  But occasionally there’s a classic commercial that’s actually worth watching for enjoyment.  Why aren’t more commercials that way?

One of the best commercials on TV right now is for ESPN.  It has 18-wheeler “big trucks” racing (using NASCAR haulers), smack talking, a sheriff in hot pursuit, and it’s a parody of Smokey and the Bandit.  (You shouldn’t need any more explanation of why it’s awesome.)  The slogan is, “It’s not crazy, it’s sports.”  The soundtrack is “East Bound and Down”, which fits so perfectly (in the movie and the commercial).

On a semi-related note, wouldn’t it be awesome to race big trucks like that, if there were no real-life consequences?  That’s why movies and video games are so awesome — because you get to do those kinds of things that would get you in trouble in real life.

review of Despicable Me

Last week I saw the movie “Despicable Me”, and I highly recommend it.   It’s a CGI-animated movie, starring Steve Carell.   There are trailers online, of course, but it’s probably better if you don’t watch too many of them, just because some of them show parts of the movie that are better left discovered during the movie.  So I’m not going to say much about the plot and storyline, except that it was great.  And that the main guy wants to steal the moon.  How original is that?

There are some great quotes in it, along with numerous laugh-out-loud scenes.  The main guy’s minions are hilarious, too — they remind me of the rabbids from the video games Raymond’s Raving Rabbids (and their own games, too).  There’s quite a bit of funny randomness in the movie, both in the story and dialogue.  So there’s no hesitation for me to speak on behalf of the staff of Buffet o’ Blog to say you should watch this movie.  (In the interest of full disclosure, some of the staff has yet to see the movie, but that’s because they made excuses and need their priorities refocused.   Perhaps we should have a organization-wide required viewing… Yeah, I think it’s that good.)

So go see it.  Although if a disclaimer is needed, I will say, “Your mileage may vary.”  But if you enjoy this blog, I would expect you to enjoy the movie, too.  The plot of it sounds like some discussions that have happened in these pages.  In fact, we’ve even had an idea for a movie featuring two evil mad scientists competing against each other.

caption contest, violinist in ocean

For our next weekly caption contest, let’s use a picture of a violinist playing his violin in the surf of the ocean.  The waves are splashing up around him, which doesn’t seem like a good thing for the violin, but that’s not our concern.  What we have to do is figure out what’s going on here.  Write a caption explaining why this man is playing his violin / fiddle in the ocean.  Or your perspective could be of someone watching this… or just commentary about it.  It can be whatever — just make it funny.

(To see our other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)