Greetings, citizen…

Today’s post is dedicated to cartoons.  Chances are if you enjoy this site, you enjoy cartoons.  And likewise, counter-clockwise, and conversely, too — if you enjoy watching cartoons, you probably enjoy the randomness that is this site.  If you don’t like cartoons, then you might be lacking a healthy sense of humor.  (But we won’t hold that against you… just start watching cartoons before it’s too late.)

Today’s tribute will consist of quotes from cartoons.  Our resident quotesmith has served up a very assorted batch of great quotes from cartoons.  Some of these may make you laugh directly, while others may lead you into good memories of great cartoons.  Either way, sit back and enjoy.  (BTW, if you can remember the particular episode or instance of any of these, you get extra coolness points.)  (Also, if you say these outloud and in-character, it’s even more fun!)

I have many super powers and a colossal bulk that frightens evil villains! ~ Space Ghost

Mankind has always dreamed of destroying the sun. ~ Mr. Burns, on the Simpsons

I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today. ~ Wimpy, on Popeye

I, Mojo Jojo, will destroy the Powerpuff Girls!  And when they have been destroyed they will be defeated, and I will have defeated them, and I will have won!  And then I will rule the world, because no-one will be able to stop me, and the world will be ruled by me, Mojo Jojo, who will be the only ruler! ~ Mojo Jojo

Calvin: Another gorgeous brisk fall day.  What a waste to be going to school on a morning like this.
Hobbes: What would you do if you could stay home this morning?
Calvin: Sleep right through it.

The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy. ~ Bart Simpson, writing 500 times on the board

Kids, just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I’m not listening. ~ Homer Simpson

(You have the right to remain silent)  “I choose to waive that right.  Aaaaaaah!” ~ Homer Simpson

He don’t know me very well, do he? ~ Bugs Bunny

Optimus Prime: One shall stand, one shall fall!
Megatron: Why throw away your life so recklessly?
Optimus Prime: That’s a question you should ask yourself, Megatron!
~ Transformers, The Movie

Quintesson: Silence, or you’ll be held in contempt of this court!
Hot Rod: I have nothing but contempt for this court!
~ Transformers, The Movie

You know, evil comes in many forms, be it a man-eating cow or Joseph Stalin.  But you can’t let the package hide the pudding.  Evil is just plain bad!  You don’t cotton to it!  You gotta smack it on the nose with the rolled up newspaper of goodness!  Bad dog!  Bad dog! ~ The Tick

There’s so many that I will have to break this up into multiple posts.  So stay tuned for more cartoony goodness.  In the meantime, feel free to share your memories and opinions in the comments section.

Today is Friday, and so I’m really working hard and stuff, so I don’t have much time to write on this.  Okay, maybe that’s an embellishment, but some of it is true.  🙂  Anyway, today I’m posting some random and humorous quotes for your personal enjoyment.  I suspect some of these might even be worth commenting on.

The original theme song to The Transformers was actually “Chuck Norris — more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris — robot in disguise”, and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up.  This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.

The best thing any of us can do to fight pollution is to adopt a vegetarian diet. ~ Pamela Anderson

If I had a dollar for every unfinished thought…

My friend said to me, “Man, this weather is trippy.”  I said to him, “No, man, it’s not the weather that is trippy.  Perhaps it is the way we perceive it that is indeed trippy.”  Then I thought, “Man, I should have just said, ‘yeah'”. ~ Mitch Hedberg

Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight.  These, of course, are only round figures.

Today is Monday.  I probably don’t have to tell you that this is the least popular day of the week.  Today humor is needed more than on other days, because work can be more depressing.  So let’s kick the week off with some funny, random quotes, including one about Mondays.

There is a technical meteorological term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days.  It’s called a “Monday”.

Have a good laugh at least twice a day to ensure regularhilarity.

Today I was wondering if insane people actually know they are insane or not.  Reason is, sometimes I think I am, or going there!  But I know it; that’s the thing.  Or I think I know it… so I worry about that.  I mean do you have to NOT think you’re insane to be insane?  I almost don’t want to know the answer to that! ~ Spacecase

I’m starting a new line of restaurants called : “Mmm… Tastes Like Chicken”, and our whole menu just reads : “Mystery meat… mystery meat… mystery meat”.

Happiness is like wetting your pants — everyone can see it but only you can feel the warmth.

If I had the chance to change just one thing in my life, I think I’d have to pick underpants.

My roommate says, “I’m going to take a shower and shave, does anyone need to use the bathroom?”  It’s like some weird quiz where he reveals the answer first. ~ Mitch Hedberg

There’s been several people search for funny Monday quotes (or some combination of those words), so today we’ll provide some random Monday quotes from our resident quotesmith’s collection.

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.

Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays… ~ secretary, Office Space

Monday is the root of all evil.

I’ve come to the conclusion that Mondays last 50% longer than the other days [each]. ~ Turtle Dundee, 7/25/06

And according to a recent study we conducted, Monday has been voted “Least Popular Day of the Week” 176 years in a row.