A Phillies fan tried to get into the baseball game with an alligator on a leash, saying it was a “service animal”. Judging by the picture, this alligator is at least 6 feet long, which is certainly large enough to seriously injure someone.
Surely this is a prank or joke or Photoshop. Has an alligator ever been domesticated? They don’t really care for humans, in general. I’ve never heard of one being a pet. And the danger factor is off-the-charts — one bite and you could lose an arm or a leg. So I’d guess this is not real. However, people do weird things, and it would not surprise me if someone actually attempted this. It doesn’t make any logical sense, but since when has that stopped some people?
Okay, so I did some research, and this actually is an emotional support animal named Wally for someone in Philadelphia. So it’s legit, but why? How does an alligator provide emotional support? I don’t get it. Honestly, if an alligator is what is giving you emotional support maybe feelings aren’t for you… 🙂
FYI, the gator wasn’t allowed into the game. I hope security took advantage of the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to say “See you later alligator!”
Let me tell you two things about Oreos that you may not know (since I made it up).
1) There are three servings of Oreos per package. Forget what the nutritional information box says on the back — that’s just to appease the FDA with their serving size suggestions and such. The evidence is that they are divided neatly into three rows, so you know how many to eat per sitting without having to count them. It’s a clever design.
2) Regular Oreos should be called Lite Oreos. The Double-Stuf Oreos should be considered normal, because they have the ideal balance between creme filling and cookie shell. (I realize this is my opinion, so others may think differently, but I have done exhaustive research on this topic and I’m right.)
Now you know…
BONUS TRIVIA: Do you know how many flavors of Oreos that have been made? (I wouldn’t expect anyone to know the literal number, but do you think it’s over 30 or 50 or 100?) One count I found is 143 different flavors of Oreos. I know I’ve seen a few weird ones in the store occasionally, but I had no idea there were that many. (Actually, I usually try to NOT look at the Oreo display in the grocery store, because I would always want to buy a package but I also want to be healthy, so they must be eaten in moderation.) Anyway, I happened across a website about snacks that ranked all 143 flavors of Oreos they found. The list starts with the worst ones, which are the most interesting (to read about, not to eat). If you want to be surprised at the crazy ideas:
From the department of “you are not going to believe this”, there’s an Italian artist named Salvatore Garau who recently auctioned a sculpture that does not actually exist and someone paid $18,300 for it! Literally, there is nothing but a certificate of authenticity and some instructions for how to display it. He calls it an “immaterial sculpture”. And this isn’t even the first time he’s “created” an invisible statue / sculpture — he’s made one that’s supposedly inside some white tape on the ground (see video image at the link above).
Rather than invisible sculptures, I would define them as immaterial sculptures. My fantasy, trained for a lifetime to feel differently the existing around me, allows me to “see” what apparently does not exist. The intangible sculptures are works that I feel as physical. Into the void there is a container of positive and negative possibilities that are constantly equivalent, in short, there is a density of events. Furthermore, the void is nothing more than a space full of energy, even if we empty it of electromagnetic fields, neutrinos, dark matter – in a way that nothing remains – it stands out that according to the Heisenberg uncertainty principle (which I recently read with enthusiasm) nothing has a weight! Therefore, it has an energy that condenses and turns into particles, in short, in us!
Now, if you aren’t experienced in the finer nuances of modern art, you might think this is all just jibber-jabber nonsense with a few scientific words included to confuse ignorant folk. But apparently he’s onto something, if multiple people are willing to bid tens of thousands of dollars to buy this art. And I completely understand what he’s talking about.
However, this is way too “high society” for most people. Honestly, middle class people just can’t afford $18,300 to buy any art piece, no matter how good it may or may not appear. Plus his requirements of five feet by five feet is a lot of spare room that most people just don’t have in their house. I get that. That’s where Buffet o’ Blog comes in.
We have for sale similar sculptures, made affordably for you. Each piece is unique, yet immaterial. It’s random, yet profound. Amusing, yet contemplative. Each order includes a certificate of authenticity. And it requires only about one foot by one foot, so you can put it on a coffee table or your bathroom counter or for your dining table centerpiece (it’s a great conversation starter!). It can be enjoyed anytime, but for optimum experience, we recommend you contemplate the depth of it while consuming your favorite beverage (like sweet tea). We also made them easier to understand — no need to ponder the uncertainty of neutrinos or any such scientific stuff. Anyone can comprehend what ours is all about.
See how much better this looks?
How much would you pay for something like this? $5,000? $10,000? It could be worth that. These are hand-crafted here in the USA — no imported ingredients ever. We pay attention to detail, and they all pass multiple stages of quality control. But because we want everyone to be able to enjoy these in the comfort of your own home, we are offering them for the low, low introductory sale price of $120 each. That’s over 95% off the MSRP!
Order now! Supplies are limited! If you pass on this offer, you might have regret for a long time (which might feel like indigestion… or bad gas).
Seriously, we priced it low so you can enjoy it. This is for your benefit. These are super premium quality — pictures don’t do it justice, you need to see it in your home. It’s not every day you can get world-famous-style art in your home for such an affordable price!
I figure at some point most everyone thinks it would be neat to somehow get in the Guinness Book of World Records. Today I had a random thought along those lines, but not for that purpose. I recently had a birthday (which was cancelled, BTW, for everyone who keeps bringing it up), and I was craving Cheetos. (We have some baked Cheetos here, which are good, though not quite the same… more like cheese popcorn than Cheetos. But I digress…) Anyway, if only I had a bag of Cheetos for every time someone said I was getting old… 🙂
Then I wondered what the world record would be for the most bags of Cheetos received as birthday gifts. That would be a fun record to break. 🙂 The concept could also be applied to Oreos…
I searched for a picture to go with this post and found this one. Supposedly the guy in the picture bought these industrial-sized bags of Cheetos direct from the factory for $65 per bag and bought 28 bags. I’m not sure I have sufficient space to store that many Cheetos in my house, and I’m most certain that the WAF (Wife Approval Factor) of that would be near 0. So maybe I won’t be chasing this world record after all… (though I still must admit it would be fun to try).
Buffet o' Blog 