a burger with too much bacon

Burger King has for years said you can “have it your way”, and in Japan, you can add 15 strips of bacon to a burger for an extra $1.25.  (I don’t know what it costs at Burger King in America, but many restaurants charge an extra $1 for 2 small strips of bacon.)  It may not be premium bacon, but, it’s bacon.

Adding 15 strips of bacon to one burger should be plenty for most people.  However, there is always someone who will say, “Needs more bacon.”  (Check out our Food Critic series for evidence of that.)  So one guy in Japan added 1,050 extra slices of bacon to his burger, which made it $90.  I don’t know how he arrived at that total — maybe he just checked how much money was in his wallet.  Either way, that’s a LOT of bacon.  It doesn’t even look like a burger anymore — more like the tower of bacon.

To no one’s surprise, he was unable to finish the burger himself.  On a related note, sharing bacon with co-workers is a great way to improve morale around the office and build friendships.

suing Michael Jordan for his looks

It might get old if you look like a celebrity or famous athlete.  Just sharing their name might be tiring.  It would probably be like that commercial of the middle-aged white guy named Michael Jordan — anytime he makes a reservation or his name goes before him, people are excited, then when he shows up, they look disappointed and say, “Oh.”  But if you look like someone famous, you might get stopped all the time in public for autographs, then people are disappointed when they realize you aren’t that person.

Allen Heckard knows how that feels.  People mistake him for Michael Jordan because of his looks, even though he’s 4 inches shorter.  He says this happens two or three times a day, and eventually he got to the point where he said, “Enough is enough.  I can’t take it anymore.”

So what would you do?  He says he’s changed his appearance some, but it didn’t work.  So he filed a lawsuit against Michael Jordan and Nike, claiming he is owed $832 million for 15 years of harassment by the public.  I wonder how he came up with that figure.  Needless to say, he didn’t win.

Heckard afterward said, “It’s not about the money.  A man has to have principles to stand on.”  That’s some principles if they’re worth $832 million!  If he’s just wanting to retire and stay home most of the time, he could’ve asked for a lot less money and still accomplished that.

Sometimes you have to wonder what people were thinking…

a manly iPod docking station

If you want an iPhone/iPod dock that looks cool, for men, here’s what you need.

Each model is built out of a solid block of aluminum, and they’re based on the exhaust manifold of a car engine.  It’s called iXoost, which comes from the English pronunciation of the word “exhaust”.  They feature several speakers, including a 140W subwoofer.

I haven’t heard one of these, but I would like to — unless I have to pay for it.  The starting price is $6200.  I think it looks awesome, but I suspect the WAF (Wife Approval Factor) would be considerably less than favorable.

You can find more info at the iXoost website, and you can even customize your own on this page.

Man Candles

There are now candles with scents aimed at men, who might not be interested in collections like “Water Inspirations” or “Citrus Passions”.

YANKEE CANDLE COMPANY, INC

Man Town™ – Escape to the man cave with this masculine blend of spices, woods and musk.

First Down™ – This combination of orange, patchouli, vetiver and leather is as exciting as game day.

Riding Mower™ – Hot sun. Cool breeze. And the intensely summery scent of freshly cut grass.

2 x 4™ – The warm, unmistakable scent of freshly planed wood and sawdust evokes a sense of confidence and quality.

Apparently this is for real, even though it sounds like a parody.  They cost $27.99 each.  I’m no marketing expert, but men typically don’t buy candles to start with, and that seems like a high price to gain entry into this market (if such a niche exists).

I don’t have any review samples, but let’s consider the candles anyway, just based on the descriptions.  I’m not sure I’d want one that smells like a man cave.  Let’s think about this logically.  If a man is single, his bachelor pad may already smell like a “man cave”.  And if he’s single, he likely isn’t buying candles.  If a man is married, he probably already has several years’ supply of candles at his house, and his wife likely would not approve of these smells anyway.

There is a nice aroma of a freshly-mowed yard, but I’m not sure I’d want that in the house.  Plus, you get that every week or so anyway from mowing the yard.

Some guys might like the 2×4 scent, but I doubt it evokes “a sense of confidence”.  I don’t know about the First Down scent, either, but I’m fairly certain a candle won’t be “as exciting as game day”.  That’s some marketing malarkey!  But this is no review, because I haven’t tried them.  Nor do I plan to, because I’m married and I never buy candles anyway.  But if you have experience with these, let us know.