caption contest, man in strange green outfit

Do Mondays give you indigestion?  If so, you should try our weekly caption contests, which start on Mondays.  They might make you laugh, and that helps the day pass.

Speaking of that, it’s Monday, and here’s our next caption contest.  This week’s photo features a man in a very unusual green outfit, walking along with some normal-dressed people.   I really have no idea what’s going on here, so it’s up to you to provide some context for what could be happening.  So leave a funny caption for this picture.  Just keep it clean…

man in green outfit walking with people

(To see the other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)

funny security guard at Brownsville revival

This post will bring back humorous memories for those who attended the Brownsville revival in Pensacola, Florida.  There was a certain security guard who kept people in line when the doors were opened.   (If you never went during its peak of popularity, people would wait outside the church ALL DAY to get into the service.  Seriously, people would be waiting in line at 7:00 AM, and the doors opened at 6:00 PM.)  This particular guard had a megaphone, and he always said the same things.  The way he said it was funny, and it was in Ebonics, which made it even better.  Here’s a sample:

“Single file line!
SINGLE FILE LINE, FOLKS!
Watch yo’ step!
No drank, cooluh, backpack, large bag, or umbuhrella will be allow in de santuareh!
Watch yo’ step!
Single file line, folks!
Watch yo’ STEP!
Hold yo’ seat!
Do not move from yo’ seat until you are told!
You may lose yo’ seat!
Watch yo’ step!”

I miss those times… not only the services, but the incredible fellowship we had on those trips.  Road trips can be a great time (if you have the right people — some folks let they attitude get musty when sittin’ in a car all day).

BTW, when our church has a revival with folks waiting outside before the doors open, I’m gonna make sure somebody with a similar style of speaking has a megaphone to continue the tradition.

story reminder

I’d like to make a quick public service announcement.  Well, it’s about this blog, but it’s open to the public for viewing and commenting, so I reckon the category still fits.

Anyway, I want to remind everyone about the latest free-for-all story that’s ongoing.  I’m going to wrap it up soon, because the progress on it has slowed to a snail’s pace (and they are notoriously slow at writing stories).  So if you want to contribute anything to it, jump in.  It’s open to everyone, even if you’re a first-time visitor here.  Just read through it before writing, so you’ll know the rules and be familiar with the characters.

Here’s the link: Are you talking to me?

Also, if you didn’t know, there have been two completed already, viewable under the free-for-all stories category.  They both turned out well, in my opinion.  They’re definitely random, and you won’t guess all the plot twists, for sure.  They are somewhat long, so if it’s too much for one viewing, you could print it out and use it for reading material in the bathroom or as a bedtime story (which could potentially lead to some crazy dreams).

Buffet o’ Bacon 3

Last night I had the Buffet o’ Blog staff over for a regular team outing (where we played video games and discussed funny stuff — how meetings should go!).  As has happened before, this meeting turned into a Buffet o’ Bacon.  It was kinda like an Iron Chef episode, where 3 contestants brought an original dish based around bacon.  (At these impromptu cooking sessions, the theme is always bacon.  Not that I’m complaining!)

First on the menu was bacon-wrapped smokies covered with barbecue sauce and grilled, and served on a stick.

smokies, bacon, & BBQ, on a stick

That one used turkey bacon, which works better for grilling and is a lot healthier.  The taste was really good.  You just have to make sure the bacon is cooked to the point of getting slightly crispy, or it’ll be easier to notice it’s turkey bacon.

The second item we sampled was bacon-wrapped cream-cheese-filled jalapenos.   We removed the seeds so they wouldn’t be too spicy (for some).  These were also delicious, although I’d like to experiment with different types of cheese.  Cooking them on a rack is essential (as I will explain in further detail on the next item).  They were also served on a stick (well, a toothpick).

bacon-wrapped cheese-filled jalapenos

Third on our list was the most ambitious creation, and the one that slightly concerned me.  It consisted of club crackers topped with shredded cheese, then bacon-wrapped and cooked for two hours at 250 degrees.  Here’s a picture of them during preparation.

bacon-wrapped club crackers, with cheese, in preparation

Notice there was no rack used to elevate the food above the inevitable bacon grease.  Supposedly it wasn’t necessary according to the recipe, that the crackers wouldn’t absorb all the grease.  I was concerned because we’ve been down this road before.  /* flashback */ At the initial Buffet o’ Bacon, there were some bacon-wrapped croissants, and the bread absorbed almost all the bacon grease during cooking.  The consistency of the croissants was like butter at room temperature, and it was deemed the “gut-bomb”.  (Read the second comment on our initial Buffet o’ Bacon for an explanation.)  /* end flashback */ So how did it turn out?  Let’s have a look:

bacon-wrapped club crackers, with cheese

What’s missing from this picture is the grease that was drained before I got in there with the camera.  Supposedly there was a pool of grease.  And if it isn’t evident in the picture, the crackers were saturated with grease, along with the cheese, and the bacon was quite greasy also.  Someone looked at the recipe to see where they went wrong, and they noticed the last line of the recipe said to cook it on a rack over a pan.  Obviously that line was never read, and the excuse was used that the picture included with the recipe didn’t have a rack in it.

We each tried a couple of them, and you could tell there was a lot of potential there, if not for the extreme load of grease.  The rest were discarded, for the sake of healthiness.   Hopefully a lesson was learned from this, because it’s really sad to throw away bacon and cheese.  (Should we have a moment of silence?)

If you want to read about our previous bacon research sessions, the link to part one is above, and here’s part two.  There are other food-related experiments and discussions — too many to list — but you can search for them if you want.

For those of you who live nearby and would like to participate in one of these in the future, there has been talk of hosting one on a Saturday afternoon and making a party out of it.  Stay tuned to this blog for further details.