Do you sing to your Christmas tree?

I like Christmas songs.  I enjoy the ones promoting the reason for the season (the birth of Jesus) as well as the more traditional ones that are more for fun.  But a few of the “fun” holiday songs make me wonder.  For example, why do we sing a song to a Christmas tree?   I’m referring to “O Tannenbaum”, or “O Christmas Tree”.

I don’t know what the official lyrics are to the song, because apparently there are many versions, with many verses.  Some of them have overt Christian meanings, while some are kinda weird taken by themselves.  Let’s look at a few of the latter variety.

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
How faithful are thy branches!
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
Green not alone in summertime,
But in the winter’s frost and rime;
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
How faithful are thy branches.

Oh Christmas tree, O Christmas tree!
Thou tree most fair and lovely!
The sight of thee at Christmastide
Spreads hope and gladness far and wide
Oh Christmas tree, O Christmas tree
Thou tree most fair and lovely!

O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree!
You stand in verdant beauty
Your boughs are green in summer’s glow
And do not fade in winter’s snow
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree!
You stand in verdant beauty

O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree!
How laden are your branches
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree!
Your presence here enhances
Your silver star does glisten bright
Reflecting all the candlelight
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree!
How laden are your branches

O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree
You fill all hearts with gaiety
On Christmas Day you stand so tall
Affording joy to one and all
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree
You fill all hearts with gaiety

Based on those lyrics, I have to wonder why a song was written to a Christmas tree…  I realize there are a lot of silly songs that have been written, but this song has been popular for hundreds of years…

caption contest, Santa in a SWAT vehicle

For this week’s caption contest, I’m using a Christmas-themed photo.  Well, it features Santa Claus, so it’s festive and stuff.  But this is no ordinary holiday photo — Santa is driving an armored SWAT truck, and he’s being followed by a helicopter.  So obviously there’s some action story behind this picture.  And it’s up to you to write the story.

(To see the other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)

a funny cooking video, for turkey leftovers

Whether or not you enjoy watching cooking shows, you’ll probably like this video I’m about to link to, because it’s funny.  It’s a clip from The 700 Club, and in this episode, Pat Robertson and Kristi Watts go head-to-head to see who has the better recipe for leftover turkey.

Before you give up on this video, just watch it and see.  They are going off on each other, and their discussion is amusing.  I realize you may have no interest in turkey pancakes — I really don’t, either — but the video is still worth watching.   And I know some of you may not care for Pat Robertson for whatever reasons, but this video is all about cooking — no politics or religion.  It’s just funny.

This is Kristi’s first attempt at a cooking show, and it shows.  Pat is particular about his cooking, and it’s obvious he doesn’t care for the “magic of TV” which makes cooking shows work smoothly.

Here’s some quotes from it, which illustrate that this is not your average cooking show.

“No offense, but it sounds sooo nasty.”

Kristi: “I’m laughing because you act like you can cook.”
Pat: “Are you kidding?”
Kristi: “Can you cook?”
Pat: “You better believe it.”

“I’m scared.”

Pat: “It looks terrible.  I don’t know what they’ve given me.  I think they’re trying to sabotage my effort.”
Kristi: “Just throw it in. It’s TV.”

“It’ll be all lumpy and gross.”

Kristi: “We have ready-made pancakes.”
Pat: “But I didn’t make them.”

“I think something is burning over here.”

Now for the video — Pat Robertson’s recipe for turkey pancakes.  According to him, it’s a great use for turkey leftovers after Thanksgiving.   I’m not sure that turkey and pancakes go together, but covering them with maple syrup has to help.

caption contest, boy at computer on kitchen table

Welcome to this week’s caption contest!  (But even if it’s no longer “this week”, you can still leave comments.)  This week’s photo features a boy sitting at a kitchen table, with his computer setup on it.  The computer looks somewhat old / antique.  He also has some food with him — pizza and milk — which happen to go well with computing (although many prefer an energy drink).   He’s also excited about something.

As usual, there is no context provided for this picture, so you can make it up.  You can make any type of joke you want — about computers, technology, homework, nerds, food, or create a story to setup your joke.   You can do whatever you want, as long as you keep it clean and funny.  That said, let’s get to the humor!

(To see the other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)