Category: In the News

a new flatulence fee

A new ordinance was just passed in San Francisco requiring certain restaurants, such as Taco Bell, to charge a “flatulence fee”, because of damage done to the atmosphere and because methane contributes to global warming.

I tell ya, the politically-correct crowd sure is pushing their over-sensitivities and liberal agendas on everyone else.  While I can’t argue that places like Taco Bell can cause exorbitant amounts of gas (as research* has shown), the government doesn’t have any right to tax us more for eating there!    * no comment.

BTW, this is not actually true, if you haven’t guessed.  It’s April Fools Day, so we’re supposed to make up stuff like this.  Unfortunately, though, some of the far-left in our society are getting so crazy that such a thing could actually happen.  If you haven’t heard, the government is debating whether to charge fees for air-polluting animals, such as cows.  Some are calling it the “cow tax”.  Let’s hope it doesn’t happen.  Not only is it stupid, but it will bankrupt many farmers and cause more meat to be imported from other countries.  And that’s not funny.  (Click here for the full story.)

political comic humor site

Friend of the blog Rurouni Kenneth showed me a funny political comic the other day, and I want to share it with you.  Instead of copying it, I’m going to give you the link to it, so the author gets credit.  There doesn’t appear to be a direct link, so click on this, then click on February 18, 2009.

Link

It’s comparing irresponsible home buyers to Congress.  It makes a great point.

If you enjoy political comic humor, there are some other good ones at that site.

While what President Obama and the current Congress are doing to America isn’t very funny, it helps to be able to laugh about it.  If only it were a joke…

Is Obama part of the biggest practical joke ever?

I remember a discussion with some of my friends where we discussed ideas for the biggest practical joke in history.  The discussion was done just for fun, because these days you couldn’t pull off a huge joke without offending multitudes of people — so many people are just wusses when it comes to humor.

But after seeing Obama’s first 60 days in office, and especially the political events of the past week, I have to wonder: Is President Barack Obama part of the biggest practical joke in history?   I keep hearing unusual news stories about Obama, and I find myself wondering if people are just making it up or if Obama is really doing stuff that stupid?   It seems inconceivable that our nation’s leader could be this ignorant and incompetent.  Here’s a few examples:

* Obama was laughing incessantly about the economy on 60 Minutes, to the point that the host asked him, “Are you punch drunk?”  That’s not something you expect to have to ask the President of the United States!

* Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez called him “ignorant”.  Well, that could probably happen to anybody.

* AIG execs get huge bonuses, and at first Obama’s administration said they didn’t know about it, then we find out they are lying.  For some reason, they decided to let the bonuses remain.

* Obama appeared on Jay Leno like he has nothing more important to do.  Has anyone told him the campaign is over and that he has a LOT of work to do?

* Speaking of which, Obama continues acting like a celebrity, thinking it’s all about him.

* Obama keeps filling leadership positions with people who don’t pay their taxes.  Don’t they run background checks?

* Obama said he wouldn’t put people in his administration who were recent lobbyists, then he did exactly that the same day, in the same speech.  You just can’t make that stuff up.

* Obama gave 25 DVDs to the British Prime Minister Gordon Brown, and then the DVDs weren’t playable over there because they are region encoded to work only in North America.  Did that really happen?  Doesn’t our President have access to better gifts for leaders of other countries?

* Under Obama, our government seems to be spending a few more hundred billion dollars every other day, when our government is already over $10 trillion in debt.   Doesn’t he realize that it’s bad fiscal policy to spend more money than you have?  And that if our country ever runs out of available credit, we’ll go bankrupt?

* Obama claims he will cut the deficit in half, but then his policies call for unprecedented spending.  What deficit is he talking about, and how many expenses are excluded from those calculations?

I could go on, but you get the idea.  I realize Obama is an amateur when it comes to leading a country, but he’s hired a lot of Bill Clinton’s former people to report to him, so they have experience (for what that’s worth).  Plus, some of this stuff should just be common sense.  So instead of thinking that Obama is really this stupid and incompetent, this must be some kind of huge practical joke.  Surely, any day now he’ll say “April Fools!” and everyone will breathe a sigh of relief and eventually have confidence in our government again.   Come to think of it, April 1st is right around the corner, so maybe that’s when we’ll find out if this is all for real or not…

the mystery of belly button fluff

One of my readers recently heard a strange news story on the radio, so they found the link and sent it to me.  The article is called “Revealed: The secrets of belly button fluff“.   They said it sounded like something that should go here.  (I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or not.)

Dr. Steinhauser, an Austrian scientist, has solved the “mystery” of belly button fluff.  He studied 503 pieces of fluff from his own belly button, and ran chemical analysis on the samples.  He works at the Vienna University of Technology, which doesn’t seem to fit with the story.  He said that shaving your belly will result in a fluff-free navel, but only until the hairs grow back.  And he said body piercings, such as belly button rings, help sweep away the fluff before it goes in your navel.

You may be wondering who cares about all this…  But Dr. Steinhauser said, “The question of the nature of navel fluff seems to concern more people than one would think at first glance.”  So maybe some of you have wondered.  I’ve never cared, though.  A similar Australian study concluded that the typical carrier of navel fluff is “a slightly overweight middle-aged male with a hairy abdomen.”  So it’s mostly older, hairy, fat men.  (Fortunately that does not include me.)  That study collected 5,000 samples.  Can you imagine studying other people’s belly button lint?

The article says Dr. Steinhauser also works on other projects, such as monitoring the erosion of his wedding ring.  I suppose if you want a research project that will last you the rest of your life, that would be one.   That sure sounds boring, though.  Also mentioned in the article is Graham Barker, who has been collecting his navel fluff in jars every day since 1984.   He’s now in the Guinness Book of Records for the world’s largest collection of navel lint.  I realize many people want to be famous, but there has to be a better way…