I got an e-mail from Thomas Wayne this morning, who apparently didn’t make it to the blog yesterday, because he forgot something important.  Check it out :

Man, there was all kinds of traffic yesterday, and it seemed like everybody had flowers and balloons in they car… was there some holiday?  Me and my woman stayed home last night and ate leftovers, and she seemed mad all day, but I don’t know why.  She didn’t want to talk at all…  What was going on?  Did you notice any strange stuff yesterday?

What can he do now?

I got an e-mail from Thomas Wayne today, and he wanted me to pass it on to the crowd here at Buffet o’ Blog.

I just remembered something that has confused me since college, and I thought some of you might could help me figure it out.  Let me explain.  One day while I was in college at UAM, I decided to go to class.  I hadn’t been in a while, and either my classroom moved or I forgot which room it was in.  So I ended up in some intellectual-type class, where they discussed and reasoned about abstract stuff.  After I realized it wasn’t World History, I was about to leave, when the teacher started talking about dookie.  I never expected to hear a college professor talk about dookie!  So I stayed in there.

The professor quoted a statement and asked the people to explain what it meant.  Here’s where I got confused.  He said :

“The poop on my shoe is hypothetical.”

I looked at his shoes but didn’t see any poop.  The people in the class gave a bunch of weird answers, some of them not even about poop at all.  So I was confused… bewildered, even.

Anyway, I’ve been reading Buffet o’ Blog for a few months now, and I’ve seen a lot of important people here, along with some folks who use some really big words, so I figured somebody here might be able to help me out.  Was the teacher saying he thought he might have some poop on his shoe but couldn’t see it?  Or was he trying to confuse us?  Or was there some type of hidden meaning in it?  Does anybody have any ideas?

~ Thomas Wayne

The comments section is now open.  If you have any ideas about what he’s asking about, share your wisdom (or wisdumb).

Thomas Wayne long suffered from insomnia. It was a rare night that he slept more than an hour. He had consulted numerous physicians in the United States and Finally went to Mexico seeking help.  Even the strongest sedatives could not give him a restful night of sleep.

One day, while in Mexico Thomas Wayne met and fell in love with a beautiful senorita named Esta Gonzales.  Now when he wants to sleep he just looks at her picture.

Thomas Wayne has known from his childhood that when you see Esta,

you sleep.

Hey, my nose just exploded!  Okay, maybe not quite.  It was more like a volcano erupting, which is kinda like an internal explosion.  The local indigenous peoples ran for their lives, seeking cover from the hot molten magma flying carelessly through the air.  Okay, maybe it was more like snot and boogers, and it didn’t go that far, but still, you don’t want to get any on you.

~ Thomas Wayne