Tag: stupid

Here comes X-Guy to save the company!

There’s this company called Acxiom that has created a new mascot for marketing purposes.  They are calling him X-Guy.  (It used to be X-Man, but that was probably too close to lawsuit territory.)  Anyway, on the company homepage, there’s a flash video where he appears to rescue a marketer who is sitting at his computer in a cubicle.  If you’re thinking that sounds lame, you would be right, but that’s what makes it amusing.

While I normally applaud the use of humor by corporations and other professional groups, I’m thinking this particular methodology probably isn’t the best marketing strategy for a company that is in the information technology (IT) sector.  This is a company with $1.4 billion in annual revenue, yet this is how they are promoting their “X” brand.  They even issued a press release to announce their new website design.  (I don’t know why…)  Regardless of whether it’s a good strategy or not, they did it, so check it out and have a laugh.

Here’s the link : Acxiom homepage.

In the interest of full disclosure, I do not work for this company.  But I am somewhat familiar with it, for various reasons.

dumb spam e-mails

Unfortunately e-mail spam is a part of life now, so we might as well laugh at it when we can.  Recently I got an e-mail from an unknown name with a subject of :

***SPAM*** Hi

Uhh, is that supposed to make me want to open it?  How dumb can spammers get?

But the stupidity doesn’t stop there!  Just the other day I got a spam e-mail that had my e-mail address as the “from” address, and the subject was “February 76% OFF”.  Um, is that supposed to fool me into thinking it’s a valid e-mail?  Like I would send myself an e-mail with that subject line and then not remember it at all?  Stupid…

crazy excuses by professional athletes

Professional athletes are known for making excuses why they lose or don’t perform well.  Here’s a couple of funny ones.

Chuck Nevitt at North Carolina State was nervous in practice, and his excuse was : “My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.”

British soccer coach Alex Ferguson talked his way out of a speeding ticket by explaining that he had diarrhea and that made him be in such a hurry.

Latrell Sprewell was griping about his contract for $14.8 million per year, saying, “I’ve got a family to feed.”  I just don’t know how someone can live on that…

Pitcher Greg Harris said he got an elbow injury that put him on the disabled list because he was flicking too many sunflower seeds during games.  Maybe he should work out more…

A British shotputter failed a steroids test and said it was because of drinking shampoo.  Uhh…

There are a lot of excuses out there and this could go on for a long time, but in closing I want to share one that has to be near the top for being random, creative, and stupid.  This is from a tennis player who lost to a hated rival in 1992 :

“Musumba Bwayla is a stupid man and a hopeless player.  He beat me because my jockstrap was too tight and because when he serves he farts, and that made me lose my concentration, for which I am famous throughout Zambia.” ~ Lighton Ndefwayl

I wish I could’ve seen the reaction by the reporters and journalists in the room when he said that.  That is just a classic quote!

how to microwave at 2x speed

I heard something unusual the other day amidst the Buffet o’ Blog staff (which is not unusual — well, the staff is, but it’s not unusual to hear something unusual; catch my drift?).  Someone posited the idea that we put some food in a small microwave, turn it on, then put that microwave in a bigger microwave and turn it on.  How do you think that would turn out?