Car horns are very one-dimensional. We might use it for multiple purposes, but it always sounds the same. So what if you had different buttons for different types of car horns to serve various purposes? For example, if the car in front of you at the traffic light fails to notice the light turned green because their phone is interesting, you can let them know. Or maybe you want to get someone’s attention but it’s not an angry or dangerous situation. Mark Rober has designed an upgrade for the standard car horn that I really like.

It looks doable for even novice engineers and not very expensive, so it would be a good DIY project. But why stop where he did? His is built for functionality, which is good, but what about fun?

Notice that he said you can load any wave file you want. (A wave file is like an MP3, just uncompressed. It’s just a file that contains music or sound effects.) Wouldn’t it be nice if you had some buttons in your car that played certain sound effects or music clips on-demand within the car? There’s much potential for fun here. A couple of ideas:

1) The obvious idea is fart sounds. Your passengers would be amused (or maybe annoyed in an amusing way), and you could use it to punctuate your conversation. A few people have “Active Gas On Command”, but most of us don’t, so if you haven’t experienced that, just imagine someone saying, “Every time Donald Trump speaks it makes me feel like” [pushes button] PHVRRRT! (Yes, some people actually have the ability to do that.)

2) Dramatic music — This could be clips from movie soundtracks to set the general tone for a few seconds, like if you wanted to activate stealth mode (e.g., the Mission Impossible theme), or you need to speed up to pass someone, or if you’re in a hurry.

3) Sound effects — Back to the idea of adding emphasis to your conversation, you could have the losing sound from the TV game show The Price Is Right, or the buzzer from Family Feud, or the pseudo-sad sound of a trombone going wah-wah-wah-wah (with the pitch going lower each time). I’d have a clasp of thunder for dramatic emphasis. (That would be so cool!) You could also have a thunder clasp followed by The Count from Sesame Street laughing, for anytime you say a number. You could have the transforming sound from the original (G1) Transformers cartoon. Maybe you’d want different car engine sounds — like a muscle car revving up or broke-down-barely-running sounds.

4) Vocal clips from movies and TV shows and YouTube videos:

• “We’re in hot pursuit!” by Buford T. Justice in Smokey and the Bandit
• “YEE-HAW!” by Bo Duke in The Dukes of Hazzard
• “Ain’t nobody got time for that!” from the classic meme
• “Wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?” from Dumb & Dumber
• “Crazy Taxi!” from the arcade game Crazy Taxi (story in the comments)
• “MUWAHAHAHA” — an evil laugh from a mad scientist or evil genius
• various sayings by KITT from Knight Rider
• “Inconceivable!” from The Princess Bride

5) Prank sounds — If you have friends who strongly dislike certain sounds or songs, you could have it queued up for the right moment. Regular blog visitor Mango-Man would certainly hear the Sanford & Son soundtrack — I don’t know why it bothers him, but it’s a good time to play it around him. You could also have general-purpose clips, like to Rick-roll someone with that Rick Astley song. Or play part of the Macarena.

This would be the audio equivalent of an animated gif in a text message. It needs to happen…

Let me know if you have any other ideas.