Tag: gas

fart interrupts city council meeting

I don’t know if you’ve ever been to a city council meeting or seen one on TV, but they can be quite boring.   So obviously it would lighten things up if someone were to rip one outloud.  That’s what happens at the meeting in the video below, and the council members try to be responsible adults and not laugh, but it’s hard to not laugh at a well-timed fart (or two).

For some reason, this kind of thing happens all the time at Buffet o’ Blog staff meetings.  Never a boring moment…

a new flatulence fee

A new ordinance was just passed in San Francisco requiring certain restaurants, such as Taco Bell, to charge a “flatulence fee”, because of damage done to the atmosphere and because methane contributes to global warming.

I tell ya, the politically-correct crowd sure is pushing their over-sensitivities and liberal agendas on everyone else.  While I can’t argue that places like Taco Bell can cause exorbitant amounts of gas (as research* has shown), the government doesn’t have any right to tax us more for eating there!    * no comment.

BTW, this is not actually true, if you haven’t guessed.  It’s April Fools Day, so we’re supposed to make up stuff like this.  Unfortunately, though, some of the far-left in our society are getting so crazy that such a thing could actually happen.  If you haven’t heard, the government is debating whether to charge fees for air-polluting animals, such as cows.  Some are calling it the “cow tax”.  Let’s hope it doesn’t happen.  Not only is it stupid, but it will bankrupt many farmers and cause more meat to be imported from other countries.  And that’s not funny.  (Click here for the full story.)

colon cleansing spam

I got a spam e-mail from ColonCleanser, with the subject line of “Complimentary Colon Cleanse”.  I don’t open spam e-mails, but if I were to, I would reply and tell them that my body has a natural colon cleansing mechanism built-in.  You know what I’m sayin’?

If you happen to be having some problems, I can send you the recipe for my infamous chili-cheese dip.  It’ll keep you regular…  🙂

Speaking of colon cleansing and all that mess, that reminds me of the classic table scene from the movie The Nutty Professor (the one with Eddie Murphy).  Quote: “You want yo’ colon cleansed?!?  Fine!  I’m gonna clean mine!  PHVRRRT!  There, now my colon is clean, I’m talkin’ squeaky clean!”  And that led to one of the greatest lines ever: “PHVRRRT!”  “Who dat call my name?”  “Yeah, I called ya if ya name is PHVRRRT!”

farting lowers your blood pressure

There’s a new article in science research that you won’t believe.  According to LiveScience, the stink in farts helps control blood pressure.  I know, you think I’m making this up, that it’s some crazy hypothesis that I pulled out of my butt.  But this is actual science.  Here’s the link, so you can verify for yourself: The Stink in Farts Controls Blood Pressure.

The stink they’re referring to is the “smelly rotten-egg” smell, which is hydrogen sulfide (H2S).  They’ve found that cells lining mice’s blood vessels make the gas and the purpose is to keep their blood pressure low by relaxing the blood vessels to prevent hypertension (high blood pressure).  Then the researchers said the gas is “no doubt” in human blood vessels, too.

So the conclusion here is obvious — passing gas lowers your blood pressure.  It also seems obvious that the inverse would be true — refraining from farting could increase your blood pressure.  So you could say farting is good for you.

On a side note, I found this link on the K-Love website, and it said “Warning: Mature Content”.  That’s not true at all!  There’s nothing vulgar or obscene in that news article, and it didn’t even make any crude jokes involving potty humor.  Why is this “mature content”?  Is farting vulgar?  I’ll answer that for you: NO!   Let me make something clear: EVERYONE PASSES GAS!  It shouldn’t be a societal taboo.  Why do some people think it’s rude?   Of course, there are some situations where you should temporarily hold it or go outside, but most of the time those exceptions don’t apply.

So my conclusion from all this is that you should let ‘er rip, because it’s good for your health.  If people get all discombobulated about it, explain that it lowers your blood pressure, and if they don’t believe you (which is likely), refer them to this article so they may be enlightened.