a cat helicopter

There’s a lot of strange stuff out there in the world and on teh internets.  That’s no surprise to you.  But this is one of the weirdest stories I’ve ever come across.

A Dutch artist named Bart Jansen had a cat named Orville (which is ironic, as you will see) who died after being hit by a car.  So he mourned for a while, then converted his dead cat into a helicopter.  This isn’t just art — it actually flies.  He calls it the Orvillecopter, and describes it as “half-cat, half-machine”.  (You could also call it the cat-mobile.)  It is literally a taxidermied cat with a propeller attached to each paw and an engine in his stomach, and it is controlled via a remote control.

The artist’s statement says he focuses on the meeting-point between technological progress and human error.  I suppose it’s better to wax philosophical about turning your dead cat into a helicopter rather than doing it just because you can.  Although I wonder if he came up with that saying before or after this art project.  Whatever…

The artist says about his cat “he received his wings posthumously” and “now he is flying with the birds — the greatest goal a cat could ever reach!”  (I’m sure there are more puns to be had at this, but that’s enough for this post.)

Of course this “art” has sparked outrage among some animal rights groups.  The owner clearly says no animals were harmed for this project, which technically is true.  Nonetheless, some people will get offended at anything.  At an art fair showcasing Orvillecopter, some anonymous animal rights activists wrote graffiti saying “Kill the animal killers”.  Apparently they don’t know the story.  That’s like those people (sometimes called trolls) who leave hateful comments without even reading the article.  Another activist said the artist should be thrown in a vat of manure when he dies.  So is the message that you should do something mean to someone if you disagree with them on ethical issues?  Isn’t that highly ironic (and hypocritical)?

Personally, I wouldn’t do this to a family pet.  But if he’s going to do it, he might as well go all out.  He should make the blades as transparent as possible and have the stand fold up underneath.  Then it would look like just a flying cat.  He could also consider mounting water pistols on it, to shoot people or animals while dive-bombing them.

If you want to see the Orvillecopter in action, flying around and terrorizing cows, here’s a video (which even features the theme song from Airwolf*):

* Some of you may not know about Airwolf.  It was a TV show in the ’80s that featured a secret high-tech military helicopter tricked-out for fighting criminals, who usually flew helicopters, too.  I don’t know if the show has aged well (I’ve never seen reruns of it), but as a kid, I thought it was cool.  There was cool music and sound effects, and there was usually real explosions.  There’s not enough TV sitcoms these days that feature explosions…  But I digress…  Here’s a brief introduction to Airwolf.

You’ll trade me what for a pair of shoes?!?

I came across this supposedly real news article, but I don’t have a link to prove its validity.  Nonetheless, given the other weird news I’ve come across, I can believe it.

Police were hoping for a good turnout at their “Kicks for Guns” sneaker exchange Friday, but they weren’t expecting to get a surface-to-air missile launcher. An Ocoee man showed up and exchanged the 4-foot-long launcher for size-3 Reebok sneakers for his daughter. Taking advantage of the exchange’s no-questions-asked policy, the man was not identified. He told the Orlando Sentinel that he found the weapon in a shed he tore down last week.

You know the economy is bad when people are trading in the family rocket launcher for a pair of tennis shoes. I blame Obama.

I wish I had more info.  I mean, how do you tear down a shed and happen to find a missile launcher?  That just doesn’t happen.  There has to be more to the story…

creating our own space laser inator

In the last post we talked about creating an explosion on the Moon.  The story ended with us lamenting the lack of funds to do such things.  It would cost millions of dollars just to create one explosion on the Moon, which is quite extravagant and wasteful.  So one of our resident genii (geniuses) suggested we build an “inator” that would accomplish this goal and be self-funding.  Why didn’t NASA think of that?

So we’re gonna build a giant solar-powered space laser.  Who hasn’t dreamed of carving their name into the moon with a giant space laser?  Not only could you customize the moon’s appearance — and sell advertising spots on it for large sums of money — but there would be many potential uses for a space laser, some of which would pay lucratively.

Burninating the countryside…

One obvious application is trying to takeover the world with it, like a classic James Bond villain.  (I think Cobra of G.I. Joe has tried that, too.)  But hopefully owning a giant space laser wouldn’t turn you evil.  (It takes a certain mentality to be a mad scientist / evil genius.  It’s not for everyone.  And that’s a good thing.)

You could use it for good also.  Here’s a few ideas:

* If someone needed to destroy a building but an explosion is too dangerous, you could melt it down with your space laser.
* If you’re camping and you don’t want to wait on a campfire to cook your food, use your giant laser — that is, if you can program it to the right power level.
* Of course there are obvious military applications.
* If someone wants to install a moat around their house, using a laser would be a lot easier than digging it out manually.
* If you can set it to “stun”, you could use it to deter bullies, thieves, neighborhood pets who poop in your yard, etc. This would also be great for practical jokes.
* If you could somehow make it look like lightning, have the remote for that functionality setup to fire whenever you say your name dramatically.  There are plenty of catch-phrases that could also be applied to.
* Use it to rid the world of evil pickles.
* You could protect the Earth from asteroids, meteors, and space junk (debris).  You could also make this into a real-life Asteroids game, which would be awesome.

I’m sure there are many other practical (or not-so-practical) applications.  I’d like to hear your ideas, so feel free to leave a comment.

creating an explosion on the Moon

I saw where somebody searched for “explosion on the moon” and found this blog, which we have talked about so that’s not surprising.  But I was curious if there was a specific explosion that someone is searching for info about.  So I did a quick search and found several links about asteroids / meteorites crashing into the Moon, which has happened countless times.  But then I saw a link where NASA was planning to trigger a massive explosion on the moon to search for ice.

NASA is preparing to launch the Lunar Crater Observation and Sensing Satellite, which will fly a Centaur rocket booster into the moon, triggering a six-mile-high explosion that scientists hope will confirm whether water is frozen in the perpetual darkness of craters near the moon’s south pole.

Flying a rocket into the moon at 5,600 mph to create an explosion is cool!  Where do I get that kind of job?

Actually, since nobody owns the moon, technically it wouldn’t be against the law to create your own explosions on the moon, right?  Of course, that would require money and technology we don’t yet possess, but we can dream, right?  🙂