a cat helicopter

There’s a lot of strange stuff out there in the world and on teh internets.  That’s no surprise to you.  But this is one of the weirdest stories I’ve ever come across.

A Dutch artist named Bart Jansen had a cat named Orville (which is ironic, as you will see) who died after being hit by a car.  So he mourned for a while, then converted his dead cat into a helicopter.  This isn’t just art — it actually flies.  He calls it the Orvillecopter, and describes it as “half-cat, half-machine”.  (You could also call it the cat-mobile.)  It is literally a taxidermied cat with a propeller attached to each paw and an engine in his stomach, and it is controlled via a remote control.

The artist’s statement says he focuses on the meeting-point between technological progress and human error.  I suppose it’s better to wax philosophical about turning your dead cat into a helicopter rather than doing it just because you can.  Although I wonder if he came up with that saying before or after this art project.  Whatever…

The artist says about his cat “he received his wings posthumously” and “now he is flying with the birds — the greatest goal a cat could ever reach!”  (I’m sure there are more puns to be had at this, but that’s enough for this post.)

Of course this “art” has sparked outrage among some animal rights groups.  The owner clearly says no animals were harmed for this project, which technically is true.  Nonetheless, some people will get offended at anything.  At an art fair showcasing Orvillecopter, some anonymous animal rights activists wrote graffiti saying “Kill the animal killers”.  Apparently they don’t know the story.  That’s like those people (sometimes called trolls) who leave hateful comments without even reading the article.  Another activist said the artist should be thrown in a vat of manure when he dies.  So is the message that you should do something mean to someone if you disagree with them on ethical issues?  Isn’t that highly ironic (and hypocritical)?

Personally, I wouldn’t do this to a family pet.  But if he’s going to do it, he might as well go all out.  He should make the blades as transparent as possible and have the stand fold up underneath.  Then it would look like just a flying cat.  He could also consider mounting water pistols on it, to shoot people or animals while dive-bombing them.

If you want to see the Orvillecopter in action, flying around and terrorizing cows, here’s a video (which even features the theme song from Airwolf*):

* Some of you may not know about Airwolf.  It was a TV show in the ’80s that featured a secret high-tech military helicopter tricked-out for fighting criminals, who usually flew helicopters, too.  I don’t know if the show has aged well (I’ve never seen reruns of it), but as a kid, I thought it was cool.  There was cool music and sound effects, and there was usually real explosions.  There’s not enough TV sitcoms these days that feature explosions…  But I digress…  Here’s a brief introduction to Airwolf.

You’ll trade me what for a pair of shoes?!?

I came across this supposedly real news article, but I don’t have a link to prove its validity.  Nonetheless, given the other weird news I’ve come across, I can believe it.

Police were hoping for a good turnout at their “Kicks for Guns” sneaker exchange Friday, but they weren’t expecting to get a surface-to-air missile launcher. An Ocoee man showed up and exchanged the 4-foot-long launcher for size-3 Reebok sneakers for his daughter. Taking advantage of the exchange’s no-questions-asked policy, the man was not identified. He told the Orlando Sentinel that he found the weapon in a shed he tore down last week.

You know the economy is bad when people are trading in the family rocket launcher for a pair of tennis shoes. I blame Obama.

I wish I had more info.  I mean, how do you tear down a shed and happen to find a missile launcher?  That just doesn’t happen.  There has to be more to the story…

Are dinosaurs extinct because of their farting?

In the news recently, British scientists (“boffins”) have announced that dinosaurs’ reckless farting might have led to their extinction.  Read for yourself:

Dinosaurs may have farted themselves to extinction, according to a new study from British scientists.

The researchers calculated that the prehistoric beasts pumped out more than 520 million tons (472 million tonnes) of methane a year — enough to warm the planet and hasten their own eventual demise.

Until now, an asteroid strike and volcanic activity around 65 million years ago had seemed the most likely cause of their extinction. …

“Our calculations suggest these dinosaurs may have produced more methane than all the modern sources, natural and human, put together.”

“Not the momma!”

Yeah, I called it reckless farting.  (Have you ever heard those two words together before?)  It’s bad enough to just fart whenever you want, but when the air becomes unsuitable for life, it’s time to change policy.  I realize they’re just animals, but you’d think they could’ve figured it out.  Even animals can learn by conditioning (like Pavlov’s dogs).  Here, you’d think after millions of years, they’d figure out a disturbing pattern.  Por ejemplo: [fart]  “Whew, that stinks.”  [fart again]  “That’s some stank-terribleness.”  [fart again]  “I can hardly breathe…”  [fart again]  “I’m about to die!”  The pattern is obvious.

Doesn’t it seem odd that there are people who get paid to calculate how much dinosaurs passed gas?  Imagine meeting new people and they ask you what you do — “I study dinosaur farts.”  You’d get some weird reactions, I’m sure.  But you’d be a hit at the elementary school on bring-your-parent-to-school day.  🙂

You’ve won the lottery… oh, oops…

What would you do first if you won the mega jackpot in the lottery?  300 Danish people were recently told they had won between 1 billion and 280 billion crowns ($49.7 billion), but it turns out they had won only between $35 to $70.  It took an hour and a half to find and correct the mistake.  How would you like to be the lottery director who gets to inform these people of the mistake?

Three hundred Danes believed a dream lifestyle of champagne and caviar awaited them this week after they were announced billionaire lottery winners — until they discovered it was a mistake. …

“Three hundred of our lottery players who won the lottery, the Keno, received a message saying they had won a sum in the billions.  And they never won that amount … We are of course very sorry.  We have now written to them to inform them of the sum that they really won,” Roersig said. …

Roersig said some of the gamers “were disappointed, others were furious and I can fully understand that, but most of them took it well.”

I have a feeling that after all the excitement and jubilation, the words “very sorry” just aren’t much consolation.  I wouldn’t be surprised if there will be some lawsuits in this scenario.  I figure some of the “winners” already quit their job and starting buying expensive stuff.  The lottery director said he’s considering increasing their winnings to help compensate for their disappointment.  I’m curious how much that would be.

I wonder if any of the “winners” sent an e-mail to their boss saying something along the lines of “take this job and shove it”.  If you know the song by that title, are you singing it yet?  It’s one of those that can get stuck in your head.  If you aren’t familiar with it, it was a #1 hit in 1978, written by David Allan Coe and covered by Johnny Paycheck.

Anyway, I also wonder how many of those people later sent an e-mail to their boss saying “I’ve always appreciated your ability to take a joke” or “My computer got a virus and sent these crazy e-mails to everyone”.  🙂

If you aren’t familiar with that song or haven’t heard it in a while, it’s (of course) all over the YouTube.  But here’s one version I remember seeing from the Dukes of Hazzard, where Johnny Paycheck got caught in one of Boss Hogg’s infamous celebrity speed traps and thus had to sing at The Boar’s Nest.  Classic stuff here…

Boss’ reactions to the main hook are awesome.  That’s one of the best TV shows of all time.

I wonder how many people have written about the lottery and the Dukes of Hazzard at the same time…  🙂