Tag: joke

mind over math

I recently had a birthday, and some friends were suggesting I am getting old. That’s simply not true. Now, the calendar might suggest I’m getting older, and I am indeed older than I was, but I’m not old. I don’t feel as old as the calendar says. So it’s mind over math. 🙂

Besides, old age is at least 10 years older than I am. It’s a moving target. 🙂

But whatever on the number of my actual age. I like to remind people that studies show that people who have the most birthdays tend to live the longest.

randomness with Chuck Norris joke

I realize Chuck Norris jokes have been around for years, so this one I’m going to share might not be new, but it’s just so random, so it fits in here.

When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone, he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris.

I mean, that just doesn’t make any sense whatsoever, yet it’s funny.  It’s amusing to say Chuck Norris is all-powerful and can do all things, but now can he traverse the spacetime continuum?  Or does he have infinite lives?

a girl’s first football game

I usually post only original stuff here, but one of the regular readers sent in a joke that many of you might appreciate, since it involves football and puns.  So here’s an exception to the normal content.

A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. After the game, he asked her how she liked it.

“Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and the big muscles, but I don’t get why they were killing each other over 25 cents.”

Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What do you mean?” “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello? It’s only 25 cents…”

Obama and the oil spill

I’m sure President Barack Obama thinks he’s completely competent to handle all situations as President of the United States, but his mishandling of the oil spill in the Gulf might prove beneficial to him.  Perhaps the oil spill was Obama’s crude awakening.  🙂