funny pictures, episode 12

Someone pointed out that many of my recent posts have been asking for contributions to the humor (i.e., caption contests), and I make no apologies for that — I really enjoy seeing how different perspectives result in varied humor.  But I realized I have been neglecting the funny pictures series, so I will continue that post-haste.

Now, for your viewing pleasure, here are several funny / weird / random / odd pictures for you to enjoy.  (Of course you are welcome to leave comments, but don’t feel pressured to.)

This reminds me of regular reader Rurouni Kenneth!
Pets have a way of letting you know when they feel neglected...
This sounds like that "Important Doctor", with his bacon and cheese diet*...

* The bacon-and-cheese diet has been referenced many times, but you can find the first mention of it here, if you care to read more…  Just remember this is a humor site, so take any of this seriously at your own risk!  Better yet, don’t take any of it seriously!

This reminds me of a guy I know... his name is Anonymous. 🙂
Grimace: Nom-Nom-Nom

There ya go.  Stay tuned for more funny pics, and feel free to peruse the funny picture archives if you are new here.

weird McDonald’s commercials

You’ve probably seen the commercials with the Burger King King, right?  Well, for those of you who think he’s creepy (and he is), take a look at the first ever McDonald’s commercial, featuring Ronald McDonald.  He’s quite creepy here, in his original form.

Man, that was terrible!  He’s wearing his food, and his dancing is not cool / hip / trendy, even for back then.  Anyway, let’s move on.  I’ve found some other old McDonald’s commercials that you probably don’t remember.  (I know I don’t remember them all, because some were aired before I was born.)  BTW, this post may look long because of the video links, but the commercials aren’t very long, so hang in there.  This may be more amusing than you expect.

Here’s a McDonald’s commercial from 1971, featuring McDonaldland, which got shut down because of a lawsuit.  Poor Mayor McCheese, never to be seen again!

Did you notice Ronald’s afro?  It was the ’70s, I guess.  Was he wearing bell bottoms?  I’m not gonna watch it again to see, because that music gives me gas.

In this next video, Hamburglar has the Magic Touch to turn everything into cheeseburgers.  It’s definitely stupid, and you might want to watch it for nostalgia’s sake, but then you’ll realize it was really lame, and you’ll wonder why you ever thought the Hamburglar was cool, except that he had a cool name.

Plus, in that video, notice the Hamburlgar brought out a big plate of burgers, and they weren’t even wrapped.  Do you know why they weren’t wrapped?  Because he stole them!  That’s what he does!  He turned to a life of crime, to steal hamburgers from McDonalds.  But do Ronald and Grimace care?  Apparently not.  After all, he is sharing his stolen hamburgers with them.  Which would make Ronald McDonald a criminal, because he becomes an accomplice.  So he shouldn’t be selling products to kids!  Crazy stuff…

In this next video, we learn that Grimace is an evil criminal also.   His name is E. Grimace, and apparently the E is for Evil.  He stole all the cups from McDonalds, meaning kids can’t have cokes or triple-thick shakes.   So what does Ronald do?  He tricks (deceives / lies to) Grimace to distract him so they can steal the cups back and take them back to McDonalds for use.  Something just doesn’t seem right about that.  And speaking of what ain’t right, what kind of creature is Grimace?  He’s a blob with several arms / legs / appendages.  He’s kinda creepy in this video, and looks obnoxiously dumb.

This next commercial is a departure from the McDonaldland theme, where workers sing about how clean the “burger machine” is and how much fun it is to clean and scrub the floor.  Sorry, but this just isn’t realistic…  Of course, I did no research on such things back in 1970 (because I wasn’t born), but I doubt fast-food restaurants were ever that clean nor that workers actually enjoyed cleaning them.

Do you remember the McNuggets from 1985, and how they could talk and sing and bounce around and even play the drums?   If you do remember without watching the video, you should overwrite that wasted memory with something productive.  Anyway, this is lame.  And watch out for bad puns!

You might have noticed a pirate near the end.  That was Captain Crook (whose parents really pigeonholed him into a career with that name!).  He tried to steal Filet-O-Fish sandwiches while avoiding capture by Big Mac, the chief of police in McDonaldland.  I reckon the producers figured you could have different characters stealing different types of food.

Well, that concludes our journey into the history of McDonald’s commercials.  Did anybody learn anything?

Thank you, drive thru…

quotes from cartoons, pt. 7

Somehow it’s been several months since I last wrote on the series.  So now I will continue it, since it’s a good thing.  For some of you, this brings back lots of good memories.  If for whatever reason it doesn’t, then you should watch more cartoons.  It’s really that simple.  Cartoons are not just for kids.  (Well, some are, but those are best ignored by all.)  Anyway, let’s get started…

I’m afraid my sidekicks are copping an attitude. ~ Space Ghost

Whoa, Space Ghost, man!  Crack a window, will ya! ~ Bobcat Goldwaith, on Space Ghost Coast to Coast

Another genius foiled by an incapable assistant. ~ Calvin

We demand that you bring this planet up to code! ~ Calvin and Hobbes

I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty. ~ Bart Simpson, on the chalkboard

Maybe, just once, someone will call me ‘sir’ without adding, ‘you’re making a scene.’ ~ Homer Simpson

I’m sorry for making gravy in the bathtub. ~ Homer Simpson

Marge: Homer, I think we have someone here who can help you.
Homer: Is it Batman?
Marge: No, he’s a scientist.
Homer: Batman’s a scientist.
Marge: It’s NOT Batman!!

Sometimes even the wisest of man or machine can make an error. ~ Optimus Prime, Transformers

Destiny’s powerful hand has made the bed of my future and it’s up to me to lie in it.  I am destined to be a superhero, to right wrongs and pound two-fisted justice into the hearts of evil-doers everywhere.  You don’t fight destiny, no sir!  And you don’t eat crackers in the bed of your future or you get all… itchy. ~ The Tick

Leela: Didn’t you have ads in the 21st century?
Fry: Well sure, but not in our dreams.  Only on TV and radio, and in magazines, and movies, and at ball games… and on buses and milk cartons and T-shirts, and bananas and written on the sky.  But not in dreams, no siree.
~ from Futurama

Fry: This can’t be happening!
Bender: It can and for all you know it is.
~ from Futurama

Now that you’re going off to war, I don’t want you to worry about your job. That’s why you’re fired. ~ from Futurama

“Say, Pooh, why aren’t YOU busy?” I said.
“Because it’s a nice day,” said Pooh.
“Yes, but—”
“Why ruin it?” he said.

[Stimpy puts the Happy Helmut on Ren]
Ren: [panicky] ‘ey!  What iz this?  Get it off me!
Stimpy: It’s the Happy Helmut, Ren.  Now you’ll always be happy!  And this is the remote control, and I use this button to control how happy you are.
Ren: YOU, SICK LITTLE MONKEY!
~ Ren & Stimpy

Ren: All right, Stimpy.  He’s got us.  Give him back the five bucks.
Stimpy: [crying] I can’t! I’ve been bad, Ren.  You’ll smack me.
Ren: When have I ever?  Now go ahead.  Tell me what’s wrong.
Stimpy: All this talk about eating made me hungry.  I ate the five bucks.
Ren: [Slaps Stimpy] You stupid idiot!  You filthy worm!  You bloated sack!
~ Ren & Stimpy

Ooooh, FREAK OUT! ~ Dexter Douglas, Freakazoid

Something smells like poo gas! ~ Cosgrove, Freakazoid

Hans: Now, come.  We mustn’t linger.  It is not safe here at night.
Freakazoid: It’s day.
Hans: Well, then, I suppose we can linger for a moment.
~ Freakazoid

A Lawn Gnome: We are wise and cunning.
Another Lawn Gnome: We stole man’s fire and then tried to hide it in our pockets.
A Lawn Gnome: That was painful and dumb.  So we became even more cunning.
~ Freakazoid

If either of you ever again ridicule an over weight person, I will personally sit on you! ~ FatMan, Freakazoid

Bad guy: Only America could produce an imbecile of your caliber.
Freakazoid: That’s because we make lots of things better than other people!
~ Freakazoid

I believe in superheroes.  I believe they are kind, righteous people who keep their word.  I admire and I respect them.  All except the Hulk fella, him I no like.  He’s got a bad smell.  Anyway, a few weeks ago, my daughter, she started dating a boy… not a Shriner.  When he come to da house for the first time, I take him to da garage, to show him my little putt-a-putt.  That’s what I call my little Shriner car, my little putt-a-putt.  When we get to da garage, this boy, his name is “Snortz” or something, he takes one look at my little car, and he starts laughing and saying: “What a stupid little car!  Hey mister, why you have such a stupid little dumb little stupid-car?  This boy!  He make fun of my little putt-a-putt in front of-a my daughter!  I felt the fool! ~ Mr. Fizzizzi, Freakazoid

Grim: How come every time I take you kids to the mall it burns to the ground?
Billy: I blame it on the economy.
~ The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy

I am the epitome of destruction… ~ gorilla to Samurai Jack


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